When You Spend Your Birthday Alone

Birthday Spoils

 I'm an April Fool's baby, and this year I spent my birthday alone. When I say alone, I do mean alone, as in the only person I spoke to in person was the barista at Starbucks and she really wasn't all that friendly. You got your free coffee now go away.  She didn't actually say it, but that was the general impression. Good thing I don't rely on strangers for my sense of self worth.

Last year my birthday couldn't be any more different. I traveled to Las Vegas to be with my parents where I spent the day before my birthday shopping, lunching, and getting a facial.  The first sister shocked me by showing up randomly after dinner that night. Then the next one strolled in all casual like a few hours later.  These sisters live out of state, and nobody told me they were coming! I was so surprised. Then the next day on my birthday my husband who lives in Germany showed up while we were out to dinner, and I pretty much lost it. I cried so many happy tears that night. We spent the evening at a Cirque Du Soleil show on the strip. I don't know if I could ever have a birthday that special as long as I live. I mean, what could really top that?

Well. Nothing. I think in general, there is nowhere to go but down after that!

This year was 100% different than the kind of birthday I had last year, but I was okay with it, because my week and my heart was so full. I had a fantastic spring break with MJ. We spent the week doing fun things, and celebrated my birthday on his last night home. I only needed on more day! Sure, it was a bummer that he had to leave the day before my birthday, but when you see your husband as little as I do you learn to be so incredibly grateful for whatever time you get.

I exercised.  I meal prepped. I spent the majority of the day editing my novel with my Pandora thumbprint station blasting. It was just like any other Sunday except it wasn't. I saved the gifts that came in the mail, so I had those to look forward to. When I opened them, there were more happy tears. I can't help it. That's what I do. I finally have something from Anthropology (that pretty mug), and I see a shopping trip at Madewell in the very near future. I received so sweet messages and phone calls throughout the day from friends and family. People who actually remembered, because I took the big Birthday announcement off Facebook years ago. My friends treated me to dinner the week after.

I've never insisted on making a spectacle of my birthday, but I'm pretty sure it would have bothered me in my twenties to spend it alone. I probably would have called myself a loser. These days, it's not that serious. I'm mostly happy on my birthday as long as I'm not at work. I spent the day with myself, and you know what? It was fine. I'm an introvert. I can handle it. I enjoyed my free birthday coffee, and I got to spend the day working on something I'm passionate about.

When you spend your birthday alone it really frees your mind to think about all the things, and that's not a bad thing as long as you keep it positive. My mind is very capable of going to some pretty dark places, but I didn't need to go there. Not even close.

I spent my birthday alone, but not lonely, and next year I have nowhere to go but up.