It's Not Facebook It's You

I have read so many things about what not to do on social media or what annoys people about social media that at this point I'm more annoyed by those articles then I am by the actual things on social media that annoy me.  This article on How to Be Insufferable on Facebook  left me totally confused.  I  wasn't sure what was left for anyone on this planet to post after it ruled almost everything out as annoying.  I mean, if you follow this persons so called rules what is left to post and why would I want to bother with social media at all if I have to consult a manual to ensure that I'm not being insufferable before I post anything?  I used to get really bent out of shape about certain things on social media too until one day I realized that social media truly is what I make of it.  I only have to be as annoyed as I allow myself to be.  Instead of writing another post about what annoys me about social media this one is about how NOT to be annoyed by social media.  Some of it is specific to Facebook but can apply across all social media platforms.

1// Cut the friend list.  People in real life annoy you right? So why would you expect social media to be any different? There is one HUGE difference a lot of people fail to remember. While you may be forced to tolerate your cousin who brags about herself or that co worker that is always such a Debbie Downer you do not have to put up with that girl you went to high school  with who chain posts collages of her and her boyfriend wearing color coordinated outfits.  You do not have to subject yourself to the political rants of your deranged step uncle or the TMI attention seeker.  If you don't like it don't follow.  The minute I started to feel that I was more annoyed or consumed with Facebook then the enjoyment I was getting out of it I did something very ground breaking.  I stopped accepting friend requests and I deleted more then half of my friends.  You may have to put up with someone you don't like in real life but the reality is you don't have to be friends with anyone you don't want to on social media. Not your mother, your sister, nobody.  If you only keep 10 friends because the rest if them drive you nuts so be it.  Or better yet just get over it because people are annoying and that's just life.  There are people that still bug a little that I haven't gotten rid of for whatever reasons and I just deal with it because really-it's not that big of a deal.

2// Customize it.  Social media, particularly Facebook is pretty customizable these days.  There are many privacy settings and other controls that allow you to personalize your Facebook experience.  Use them. If you are worried about offending people on Facebook by defriending just hide their posts.  They will never know the difference and you can check in on them when you feel like it.  That person that blows up your news feed by sharing every single video or article they read needs to be stopped.  They might feel the need to share their comprehensive internet experience by posting a million videos, pics and links per day but you don't have to see it.  I started hiding certain feeds and suddenly, my newsfeed became very boring (in a good way) and when it wasn't boring it was filled with things I was actually interested in seeing.  

3// Understand that the very thing that drives one person up the wall may not bother the next person at all. There is a good chance that you are doing something that annoys someone even if you feel you are doing everything "right" because there is no right. There are people who hate any and all hash tags, roll their eyes if you post more then one pic a day and can't stand your stupid inspirational quotes. There are people who complain if you post the burger and fries you had for lunch or your sweaty post work out pics even if you don't do it a lot.  I've done both by the way, and so what.  I tend to operate on the anything in moderation idea but even so you still can't please everyone.  We are all so different.  It's impossible.

4// Accept that Social media is selfish in nature. We get our own handle, write our own about me blurb and choose our profile pic. It's all about US. If it weren't what else would we be posting all day? Even if we post a video that we think is funny and might make someone laugh we are posting it because WE like it and you can bet there will be probably still be someone who won't appreciate it. Someone who will be thinking there she goes posting another stupid video.  It's also perfectly selfish in that we can customize our own experience not only regarding what we choose to see but what we choose to post.  Since you already know you can't please everyone just please yourself.

5// If you don't want people in your business don't share it.  If you can't or won't unfollow, defriend or customize your privacy settings just don't share it.  Really, it is that simple.

6// Separate yourself from it. Who are all of these people and why do I care about everything they are doing?  Why is it necessary for me to share my every thought?   Take a deep breath and step back.  Just because you can share doesn't mean you have to.  All the time.  Just  because you have the ability to peek into peoples lives doesn't mean you have to.  All the time.
 
There are a lot of things I like about social media.  I like staying connected with certain people.  I like seeing pics of my out of state nephew regularly and staying caught up on news in the gymnastics world and other things that interest me.  I like it that I can send group messages, coordinate events, allow people to see pics and just in general engage with others.  I know people who don't have Facebook accounts saying they will "get in trouble" because you know, Facebook is so powerful it can destroy relationships.  Others have deleted their accounts 10 x over because they can't stand the "drama" or they get too consumed with it.   Others say they just don't like people to know their business.

I'm here to tell you one thing.  Don't let annoying people take Facebook (or any other form of social media) away from you.  If it doesn't do anything for you and you are not interested in it at all that's one thing but if you quit because others annoy you I'm not sure how much sense that makes when it's only as annoying as you allow it to be. Forget about trying to please everyone on social media. It'll never happen. Just worry about pleasing yourself.  The ones who don't like it can just unfollow and you can do the same

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