I Am Not My Own Boss

Do you ever get really, really annoyed with work for stealing your fun, and preventing you from doing things that you want to do?  When I'm really tired, waking up in the morning for work is the worst.  Who wants to sit in an office all day when the sun is shining and there are so many other alternative activities in this world?

That was me last week.  Slightly bitter because my husband was home for a limited time only.  It was a surprise so I had no extra days off planned, and had just taken quite a few days off two weeks prior when he was here.  It sucked getting out of bed when he was still in it, and sitting at work when he was sitting at home.  I rushed home every day so anxious to spend what was left of the day with him.  We didn't do much, because even though he was on vacation, I was in work mode.  I was tired (although so was he from jet lag) and had to be up early, so we ate dinner and watched TV.  Not super exciting, but time together is time together and I was glad to have it.

It's times like this when I wish I was one of those multi-level millionaires that work from home and poolside locations throughout the world.  Surely you've seen their pics and gushing testimony all over social media about how awesome their life is.  How they make so much money that they retired their husbands out of the workforce.  How they can work from anywhere as long as they have a laptop and wi-fi.  How they don't have to ask their boss for time off, and no longer hate Monday's.  They seem to be on cruises a lot. 

Be your own boss.  Be home with your kids.  Take vacation when you want.  Drink wine in front of a fireplace on Tuesday afternoon.  But isn't that sales?  Oh no, you don't have to sell anything.  It's so easy!  Working 9-5 is unnecessary. 

Guys.  I don't get it.  If I don't have to sell anything then how do I make money to support myself?  Multi-level marketing is all about sales, but I have been approached by people who claim to be making a lot of money and claim that you don't have to sell anything.  If your income depends upon a product that you actively promote it is sales.  Even if the product is so good it sells itself, it's sales.  Let's just say it's true and you don't have to sell a specific product or a specific thing, you are most certainly selling something.  You are selling the program, and you are also selling yourself in a way.  That's how you get people to sign up...so you can make money off of them...and then you motivate those people so they will get other people to sign up...so you can make money off of them. 

I don't doubt that there are people making a ton of money selling wraps, essential oils, fitness products or cosmetics, but I have this feeling that they are the exception not the rule, and that there are just enough of them to make people think it's easy to have that same success.  I also don't doubt that there are a lot of people stretching the truth and probably don't like it as much as they claim or don't make full time living off of it as they imply, because if it was truly that easy, and that lucrative why isn't everyone doing it?  Why hasn't everyone quit their jobs, signed up to sell whatever it is they like, and found themselves rolling in the dough on a permanent vacation?  Also, if everyone did it, who would do everything else?  From what I understand, we actually need people working in offices, retail shops, hospitals, airports, and all the other places that are integral to society.
This Guy.  Heart face emoji
So yeah, last week I was a little bit bitter about having to go to work.  It happens to the best of us, I'm sure.  Why can't I be that girl I follow on Instagram posting about how she sold enough wraps to buy a house and gets a six month vacation twice a year?  Then I thought about how I probably couldn't sell ice-water in hell.  Not only do I suck at sales or promoting, I don't like it.  I don't even like pimping out my own blog.  I do it sometimes, and  there's nothing wrong with it, but it usually makes me uncomfortable.  I'm also pretty risk adverse.  I like the idea of knowing that I'll get a paycheck every month.  It may not be #girlboss #instagramgoals but I also like generous paid time off, my retirement plan, and paying $0 dollars for a zero co-pay no deductible health insurance plan.  My job is solid.

Earning money online as your sole source of income isn't for everyone.  This blogger could write one million posts about how she made $100,000 in a month online.  Not in a year a single month, but I still wouldn't be able to figure out how to do it!  My mind is literally blown by how successful she has become through blogging.  This girl is legit, and she doesn't brag about it, she informs. 
Burgers Again!!
Plenty of people find another way, but that isn't my path.

My job limits the amount of vacations I can take, and the days I can stay home, but I also wouldn't be taking vacation if I didn't have it.  I wouldn't be doing a lot of things if I didn't have it.  I might not even own a home if I didn't have it.  We love to travel, and thanks to my job, not necessarily in spite of my job (because that's the better way to look at it), I have managed to take some pretty fantastic vacations.  Over Thanksgiving I got to spend a nice chunk of time with my long distance husband.  Last week I got to spend a wonderful long weekend with family.  It may not be as much as I want.  It never is!  But that's life.  Some things you can and/or are willing to change, others you can't and/or won't.  You maximize what you have, make it work, and even if it isn't ideal, you have to move past the bitter and be glad for the good things you got.  You really just have to.     

I had to make do with less time with MJ than I wanted last week, I live for the weekends, I hate Monday's, and the only thing I get to choose about my schedule is what time I take my lunch break, but we saw Beauty and the Beast together at the "fancy" theater The Lot, and spent too much money on overpriced drinks downtown just because.  Searsucker is kinda pricey, and we could have stayed there and eaten if we wanted to, but chose to get sloppy burgers at Cold Beers & Cheeseburgers instead.  Yes, that's the name.  I'm not a Girl Boss.  I am not my own boss.  I have a boss, who I had ask for an extended time off this summer.  The answer was yes, and for all of that...all of it...I am grateful.      


Nylse Esahc said...

You are wise beyond your years. Everything is not for everyone and there is joy in contentment. But it is nice to be earning some money (a modest amount) off of blogging so that's my goal.

The Lady Okie said...

I can REALLY relate to this and agree with a lot of what you said here. We do need 9-5 (really 8-5, who are we kidding) workers in society, and some of those work-from-home jobs I just wouldn't want to do! It is hard when it's such a beautiful day and I just want to call in and not go to work, but focusing on the time we do have with the people we love helps a lot :)

Emily Jane said...

I'm pretty sure those people make ALL their money by selling a "Dream" (not reality), to viewers at home. I put no stock into it. I would love to work from home. My profession allows me to do so. But again I'd still be chained to my desk. I think we all go through ebb and flow of the monotony of our days. Sometimes we appreciate our jobs and other times we want to climb up the walls of our cubicle and get the heck out of there.

Theres been times where I've resented the fact I have to work so much instead of being home with my child, but if I were a stay at home mom I'd be bored to tears too. There's no winning. I think the time with those we love is even more special especially when we can't spend every single hour of the day with them.

I'm glad you've been able to spend some time with MJ while he is there on vacation. Even if you have to be at work during the week.

Faith said...

Especially on nice days when you really wish you could be out and about. But the 9-5 (really 7-3:30pm for me) helps me not only pay bills and things that I want to do, but it helps me keep busy. Unemployment a few years back was so hard on me so I really appreciate having a job that I enjoy and have made great friends from. But I hear you, some mornings I hate the fact that I have to go to work.

The weekends are so much more appreciated and anytime I'm able to spend with family is appreciated because you have to make it a point to fit in the people you love when you don't have 24 hrs to do as you please.

A lot of these people who are working for themselves especially in blogland tend to be people who buy endlessly and seem to have an unlimited amount of funds for so much material things (sorry if I'm going off topic) it has to feel empty sometimes. How many things does one person need? I don't know. I've begun to appreciate those who work 9-5 as they still seem to have a grasp on the real world.

Amanda @ MyLifeIGuess.com said...

As appealing as being my own boss sounds, I don't think I could do it either. I like the stability of having a 9-5 (especially after being unemployed for so long!) and the "work perks" that you can't get as your own boss. (Like, an employer-matched pension, paid sick days, etc.)
But I get it. When I was out of work and at home all the time, all I wanted to do was to go back to work. Now that I've been back to work for over 7 months, all I want to do is stay home!

Whitney Alison said...

I have struggled with this so much lately. I see people who have transformed their corners of the internet into financial independence. I see friends who have jobs that allow them to work remotely from anywhere. Then there is me. Stuck here at my regular everyday job....Sometimes I feel like we're sold this bill of goods that if we DON'T have a successful side hustle, or aren't generating income somewhere else we are failing. I also know myself and know that being my own boss wouldn't not work longterm.

Todra Payne said...

I know I'm late to this party, but I have to disagree with just one statement here - if you didn't have your job (that you don't like) you wouldn't be able to take vacation or own a home. I respect that you don't like sales, but that's not the only alternative. I love that no one controls my days or tells me where I have to show up, but I realize my path isn't everyone's. I hate MLM companies and would never do that because I feel like all your friends start avoiding you because they think you're constantly trying to sell them something.

However, if you want more freedom but don't want to be a freelancer or an entrepreneur, then there are corporations that allow remote work. My friend worked for the same company for 8 years while she lived all over Europe (she's an American) and made her own schedule. Unlike me, she's the most corporate person I know, but she was still able to have a bit of control over her life. She wasn't stuck in a cubicle. There's no mandate that says you have to work a job that makes you feel drained and bitter. Most Americans accept that as a way of life. There's no reason to, though. I hope you find an alternative that makes you excited to get up in the morning. They do exist - without selling or pimping your blog.