My Husband is Awesome

I don't think working full time and going to school is for everybody.  Lots of people are doing it but I seriously don't know how they survive it.   I am weak.  I'm a baby when I don't get enough sleep and I get stressed out when I have a lot on my plate.  I did two semesters part time at community college and it just about killed me.  I came home from class in tears because I was so exhausted and so tired and had no idea where I would find the time or energy to get everything done.  My husband is a lot stronger then I am.  I already knew that.   WE already knew that, but doing what he did is just one more example of how much stronger.  For the past three years Mj has been a fixture at the dining room table doing homework for hours and hours on end.  I come home from work and there he is posted up in front of his laptops.  I'm chilling on the couch on Sunday catching up on the old DVR and there he is doing homework all. day. long.  I really did feel sorry for him slaving away while I dozed in and out of sleep on the couch.  Some week nights we'd hardly even talk because he'd be doing homework from when I got home until we went to bed. 

He's been counting it down month by month, week by week and day by day.  Literally.  I got an update every week.  I "used" him as motivation to get some writing done and got him to come with me to my favorite coffee shop to work.  I wish I'd started it sooner because I got a lot done with him and it was fun.  He spent all Sunday working on his final project and now after years of hard work he finally has his degree and is so happy to be getting his life back.   Not that he ever really stopped living it.  My husband is a busy body.  He still hung out with his friends.  He cooked and went through all kinds of random baking phases.  He did his Army Drills.  We went on vacations.  We had date nights and DVD nights at home.  He went biking.  He did two cycles of P90X last year.  He did kick ball, dodge ball and is in his second flag football league in a row right now.  In fact, he's in two different leagues.  He just does not stop.  Needless to say he's really good at multi tasking while I'm tired just thinking about it. I'm such a slacker. He says he doesn't know what he's going to do with all this extra time and I'm thinking he may not want to tell me that because I'm sure I can think of a few things to help fill the void.

I'm so very proud of him.  When we met he told me that getting his Bachelor's degree had been a goal that he set out for himself a long time ago.  He did active duty Army, traveled the world then once he went to part time Army the degree was next on his list.  He had some setbacks.  It took him longer then he planned.  Army reserve training, deployments and life in general got in the way but he buckled down and got it done.  And what's really awesome aside from the whole getting your college degree thing is that between the GI Bill and his job benefits he hasn't paid a dime out of his pocket.  How freaking amazing is that in a time where most college graduates are drowning in student loan debt?  He even has a new job position lined up for next month.  He's a smart one alright, and he's cute. I'm just glad I snatched him up when I did.
 
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The School Experiment

I hate to say it but working full time and going to school is for the birds.  I can't even imagine if I was going full time or had kids or anything else.  I have so much respect for people who earn their degree as a full time working adult.  My husband is working on his B.A. right now and I'm really proud of him for persevering even though it's so hard.  Last semester I took 2 community college classes.  One fully online and the other partially online.  Some of those nights that I had to work from 8-5 then go to class from 6:30 to 9:50pm were pretty awful.   I started out good but by the last class I was so over it.  Online classes are no piece of cake either.  You really have to watch your deadlines and you don't have to go to class but you still put in a lot of time doing the assignments and discussion boards.  Trying to juggle work, the gym, house work, socializing and time to relax while fitting in class and homework is hard.  I was genuinely interested in my classes.  One of them was even to explore a possible new career option.  I found that I actually enjoyed the challenge of learning and being tested.  If I take a class I'm gunning for an A so it was frustrating to feel that I just didn't have the energy or time to put into it that I wanted to.  The day I took my last final I felt so free.  My time off from work became my own again and I really missed that.  I was worried that my mind had turned to mush after being out of school for so long but I got A's in both classes.  I'm taking two short term (hopefully easy!) 8 week courses this semester to get the 12 units I need to get my pay bump at work and then that's it.  I'm officially back in school as of today.  Not thrilled. 

Thank goodness I got my BA done when I was still a bright eyed fresh faced unemployed/part time working 21 year old because if I had waited who knows if it would have ever happened.  I'm glad I did this though.  This little school experiment affirms what I kind of already knew.  At this point in my life school is just not for me.  If money and time were no object maybe.  If I had my eye on a specific career goal that I was passionate about maybe.  If someone promised me a million bucks if I get my Masters degree...big maybe! But with my current life circumstances it's just not something I want to undertake and it's good to know that for sure now instead of having to wonder.

Back to School

I graduated College with a B.A. a loooong time ago and didn't look back.  I enjoyed my four years in College but was really happy to get my life back and move on from the poor College student lifestyle.  Without any specific career goals in mind and an unwillingness to take on any more student loans then I already had Grad school wasn't something I wanted to pursue.  The loans are long since paid off but I'm still not interested.  So why do I find myself looking at a College campus map to find my class room and the bookstore where a teenager informs me that I need to leave my purse at the door and then I drop $115 bucks on a giant used book?  It's so weird.  Back in the day when I was a student who wore jeans, tennis shoes and a UCSD sweat shirt to class every day we didn't have online registration.  I don't even know if my College had a website back then 'cause I didn't even have a computer.  You had to wait in really long lines for a really long time to pay all of your fees in person and we registered by phone.  I used a word processor to write my papers and Wikipedia didn't exist.  Now I can register, pay fees, drop classes, and order books online.  Do people still go to the Library to do research?  Is it biologically possible that my mind has turned to mush after all of these years?  Times have changed and so have I. 

Life just feels busy enough as it is and I truly value my free time outside of work to relax and take care of business.  It was hard enough for me to add the gym back into my life let alone school.  At my job we get a pay bump if we earn 12 units of college credit.  I've known this but have been too lazy and unmotivated to do anything about it.  We even get reimbursed for it so I really should've done it a long time ago.  I'm not trying to push it so I'm only taking 2 classes this semester and then I'll take two the next.  I've chosen classes that I have a real interest in so that hopefully I won't hate it.  I'm taking an Introductory Paralegal course and planning to take Nutrition which doesn't start until October.  Only the Paralegal course requires me to physically attend and the other will be online.  It sure makes my day long working from 8:00-5:00 pm then going to class from 6:30 to 9:50pm.  I went to my first class and got my first homework assignment Tuesday night and I'm already tired.  At least I wasn't the oldest one in the class.

I think it'll be good for me to do this.  It feels productive.  If it means less couch and TV time then that's probably a good thing but I definitely see it cutting into my gym time.  It's just one night a week so I need to stop being a wimp and deal with it.  Plenty of people have been working full time and going to school full time for years.  Some of them even have kids to juggle.  My very own husband is taking a full time course load online.  Surely I can handle 6 measly units at Community College.  That's what I'm telling myself anyways and I hope I'm right.

Is College Really Worth It These Days?

I just read an article on MSN money about how the average cost of a 4 year private University education has climbed to $35,636 per year. I am so glad that I am not a young high school graduate today who has to make the decision as to whether going to College is worth the money or not. When I graduated from high school it wasn't a question. You might have to go the 2 year Community College route first but bottom line, going to College was always seen as the way to go no matter what. These days, I am just not so sure.

The economy is basically in the toilet right now, but even if it weren't it is beginning to seem that the sheer cost of a College degree has outstripped and over shadowed the very purpose for which it was intended. Yeah, you may go to College for personal growth and enrichment purposes but ultimately your intention is usually to gain a return on that investment in income once you enter the job market. Trina Thompson may have been the only one ridiculous enough to sue over it but she is definitely not the only one who feels short changed.

Are 4 year Universities only for the wealthy and those who are smart enough or poor enough to earn full scholarships and grants? It seems the Community College route 1st is the only way to go if you are willing and/or able to because to spend $140,000 on a degree, especially to work in a field that is not a typically high earning one is plain stupid. State school prices are out of control too. Gone are the days where you could just go and major in general studies or whatever else just to get the degree and the satisfaction of a goal accomplished and worry about the field you will enter later. You could always wait until you get your Master's for a more focused approach once you figure out what you really want to do. I really don't think that's such a good idea these days. I didn't really have a plan but I knew I wanted a degree so I went and majored in a Sociology but if I were in the situation that these new high school graduates are facing and I didn't have a solid career path and plan in mind I might not have gone at all. And, if that had been the case I wonder where I would be now?

I worry about my little sis who is going to an extremely expensive school in an expensive city too far away to cut costs by staying at home with such stiff requirements that hardly anyone can even finish in 4 years. She has taken out a lot of student loans while she works part time. I want nothing more then for her to hit it big and be so successful that the student loans won't hurt her. I believe that if anyone can do it she can and I really hope that she does.

I am very glad I got my degree. I went to a 4 year publicly funded University. I graduated with 16k in loans and felt that wasn't really all that bad. I lived on campus (apartment, not super expensive must buy a meal plan residence halls) for two years and commuted the rest. I didn't get to "go away" to college but that's OK. My semester exchange out of state at Spelman College my junior year more then made up for it. The loans are paid off, I don't want to start all over and I still don't know what I want to be so I am not even considering a Master's degree at this point. I feel better about myself in general having earned my BA and I do believe that even though it was not a requirement for my current job it certainly helped me get it.

As an adult online and accelerated programs seem to be the route many are taking but those are by no means cheap. There are many who haven't gone to college who are highly successful and some who have degrees that are barely squeaking by. What is one to think? I wouldn't discourage anyone from getting a degree. I'm just saying that you really need to be careful about how much money you are willing to invest and cut corners financially where you can because there really are no guarantees on what you will get out of it. Crippling loans can carry huge consequences.

If you insist on going to that prestigious school because it has an excellent reputation, is far away from home and has the total college experience written all over it that's great, but be prepared for the possibility that you might be paying for it for the rest of your life.

High Cost Degree Can Be A Gamble

There is a story that circulated the Internet last week about a Bronx girl who sues Monroe College, NY for $70,000 tuition reimbursement because she can't get a job in the IT field as she was led to believe she would. I think this girl is ridiculous as most seem to agree. You go to college and you put out the money to do so with hopes that it will lead to a good job and higher earning potential but that is not always the case. Neither the college or anyone else can guarantee it. You weigh your options and you decide just how much money you are willing to invest in the possibility of that correlation being true and you hope for the best. I was conservative and I am so glad that I was.

I didn't know exactly what I wanted to do so I wasn't about to spend excessive amounts of money on College if I didn't have too. My 4 year degree in Sociology cost me about 16k in loans which have since been paid back and will not prevent me from buying a house or ruin my credit. I got into USC. I liked the idea of the ultimate College experience but I didn't like the price tag. I went close to home to an excellent state funded school and cut costs by living in an on campus apartment instead of dorms then commuting the last 1 1/2 years. I took advantage of a semester exchange program where I attended Spelman College in Atlanta GA. I had an amazing "going away to college" and private school experience and didn't have to pay their prices. That one semester away was much richer and way more memorable then all of the other years put together. I will truly treasure that experience forever. I may have missed out on some things by being practical but I got what I went there for-my degree. I worked too, and didn't use my loans to pay rent and subsidize my lifestyle as so many do. I am currently in a job where I don't use that degree and I make less then many people who have not earned a college degree yet. Although it has been helpful in my job endeavors the cost would not have been worth the benefit if I'd spent 70k. A degree was a goal I wanted to accomplish so no matter what, I'm glad I did it. If you want to be a doctor or a lawyer you know it costs but you also know that you will make an extremely high income once hired and that there is always a need for those professions. I am not sure exactly how much difference it makes to get a Liberal Arts degree from Harvard or a no name besides the price tag. Perhaps it is advantageous because it's such a prestigious school. Again, it's a gamble.

A particular school just might have a great program and/or prestige that could open doors in the field that one wants to pursue or it could simply be a goal to go to that kind of school. I am not knocking anyone who shells out the big bucks to pursue a degree. I just think that when you do that you should be aware of the possibility of not gaining on that return and don't blame others if you don't.

Read Article about Trina Thompson suing Monroe College.