2 Amazing Years

Yesterday Mj and I had a wonderful day together. Nothing big. Sleeping in. Lounging around in pajamas for a bit. Catching a matinee [Shutter Island] and running a few errands. Cooking tostadas together and eating dinner and beer in front of the TV while watching a DVD. The sun was shining, the day was relaxed and I was happy. Just happy to be in that moment. Ordinary day or not it was perfect. I'd look at Mj and think to myself "Oh my god, how I love that man." This amazing feeling of love sometimes just overwhelms me. I look at him and I cannot believe that this amazing person is mine to have and to hold. He has gotten used to me just sort of staring at him for no apparent reason with this [hopefully] dreamy look on my face by now.

Like life a relationship is composed of moments. Snapshots in time. Not always perfect or ideal and often times pretty ordinary, but snapshots just the same that create the continuum of what we do and who we are. That moment that I met Mj was life changing for me. I certainly didn't know it at the time but I was meeting the man I always wanted and needed. He completes me. How corny is that? I mean, it is best known as a Jerry McGuire quote but corny or not it is so true. There aren't better words to describe it. I cannot imagine a world in which he does not exist. I don't want to.

Sometimes I get annoyed at him when he leaves his socks on the floor, his clothes hanging haphazardly over the couch or he looses something else. There has to be a laundry list of ways that I probably annoy him with my neat freak tendencies, pessimism, and being so darn picky when it comes to food just to name a few. He is not perfect. I am not perfect. We are not perfect. But that does not matter. We are perfect together and any imperfections he may have are drowned in the love that I feel for him. Sometimes I do not feel worthy, but he loves me despite all of my flaws. There is this level of comfort in the knowledge that simply being me is enough.

2 years ago today we had our first date on a rainy Saturday night. We got set up by my friend. They were both in Arizona for some Military schooling and at a get together and she had the bright idea after meeting him that we should meet up. And meet we did. Fall in love we did. And now I feel like the luckiest girl in the world. I was working a promo job that night. I was downtown and when I saw a silver SUV pull up to the designated spot outside the convention center I walked right up to it and got in. I suppose he could've been a psycho or another guy who's calls I would have to dodge but instead he turned out to be my future husband. We ate dinner at Friday's. I was dating just for the hell of it but this one stood out for me because I genuinely laughed like I had not on any other date. It wasn't that ha, ha polite kind of laugh but one from the heart. This one was different.

One date led to another. I could only describe it as a whirlwind of fun, romantic dream dates and getting to know each other better. I would tell myself one day that this guy better not expect me to spend every weekend with him and then the next thing I knew that was all I wanted. I was reluctant to take this journey because of my issues, my fears and because of my past. My sometimes very depressed and often isolated lifestyle was not healthy and often unhappy but to change anything about it would mean to lose control and that terrified me. When it was just me I could and did neglect my own emotional well being but having him in my life meant I could no longer do that. I could no longer wallow in misery. It meant I needed to do better. Not just for me but for him too. Finally, I could no longer ignore what my heart was telling me and I chose happiness. It was really hard for me to let go and let love in but when I did I fell head over heels. We missed out on eleven months of our 2 years together when he was deployed but we quickly picked up where we left off and have made up for lost time. It was a tough time for me but he was well worth the wait.

I am sitting at my desk at work when I hear a man say he is looking for me. He walks back to my desk with a package from Edible Arrangements. I am puzzled and completely surprised. This day never actually became our official anniversary because we became engaged the same year that we met and changed it to that instead for the following year. Inside are chocolate & peanut butter covered apples and a note that says "Do you remember what day today is?...I do." And of course I remember. It was only one of the best days of my life. And I smile because I am lucky and happy. And because I remember all the times it felt like there was nothing worth living for and thanks to Mj I now know without a doubt that there is.

I'm Gettin' Chair Covers

I know I know, it's probably something someone somewhere made up to convince brides that there was something so wrong with chairs that they needed to be covered up so they could make money and I am falling into their evil trap. I just couldn't help but be amazed when I saw before and after pics with and without. I love the way they totally transform a room and make it so festive and elegant. It's a great way to incorporate your wedding colors too.

When I saw that the ballroom chairs at our venue were gold not some ugly maroon or green color I decided that chair covers were not a must have. It's a nice cozy ballroom on it's own. I would table it and see where we ended up budget wise everywhere else AND what kind of deal I could get and make a decision then. Aside from my little simple centerpieces that I am making and the tulle to decorate the ceremony arch I am not doing much decorating so it would be nice to do something but not at the expense of budget. When even the groom pipes up and says that it would be a really nice touch...well, then you really have to take it into consideration.

Some charge as high as $4.50 per chair but I found a lady that works out of her home who only charges $2.70 a chair total!! This is pretty much the lowest price anyone is offering them for in our area. This includes delivery, set up, and breakdown. That is a super bargain and I really wanted them so I decided to go for it. The total cost is $202.50 for 75 chairs. I also added the $11.00 insurance at .15 per chair so if any permanent staining or damage occurs to any of the covers I won't be responsible for replacing them.

I considered black covers with pink sashes because those are our exact colors but have decided to go with a white cover and the light pink organza sash instead. The black just didn't look right against a white table cloth and even if I wanted to pay for black linens which I don't.  black on black would have darkened up the room way too much. I plan on choosing the black linen napkins.

I'm even getting excited about my DIY centerpieces now which will cost about $80 total for 10-11 tables. I found slightly fuller and a bit higher rounded vases at Walmart with a lip at the top for $1 each. This one is not so tiny and it will allow me to tie a black organza bow around each one. I'm adding a single floating pink carnation to each. It will be lit up with a submersible LED light and have pink stones at the bottom. They will sit on top of the round mirror and be surrounded by 3 votive candles and I'll scatter pink and black silk flower petals around it. So far, I've only found black ones online and the best price is 500 for $6.00 at eFavorMart.com. It's all coming together!

I am so thrilled to be adding such a pretty decoration to our venue that actually fits my budget. Our reception will be transformed into this beautiful display of whimsy and elegance. I am so not the girl who has always dreamed of a fairytale wedding. Not that I didn't want one. I just never imagined it would be possible for me and it's so exciting to feel like I am getting one now.

Bridal Bouquet & Dress Size

Did anyone know that the size of the bride is supposed to play a role in the size of her bridal bouquet? I surely didn't but come to think of it the florist did mention something about my size and that the bouquet should not overpower me or overshadow my dress. I guess it makes sense I just never thought about it. In doing some internet research I actually came across a formula.

• Dress size 1-10=12 roses
• Dress size 12-18=18 roses
• Dress size 20+ =24 roses

I came across this pic of a bride with a gigantic bouquet and it is a perfect illustration of how a bouquet can overshadow a bride. Now that's a big bouquet if I ever saw one!! You can hardly even see her dress behind that thing. I think they went a bit over board on that one.
Also, you are apparently not supposed to toss your actual bridal bouquet. The florist asked me if I wanted a throw away one and I decided not to for budget reasons. If I do a throw away bouquet you can bet that will be one I buy at the grocery store and put together myself! I am not even sure I want to do a bouquet toss. I think I will see how many single ladies there are going to be and decide from there. And, the more I think about it the less I want to throw my $110 bouquet away. It's going to die anyways and I will be throwing it away eventually but I guess for sentimental reasons I would like to wake up the next morning and still have it around.

Flowers Aint Cheap

But then I knew that already. I went to the flower shop I was referred to at the tasting a couple weeks ago today to get a quote. When I originally did my budget way back when I was still searching for a venue I used $700 as my figure. Since then, I had dropped it down to $350 after running some numbers and taking into account the anticipated number in our bridal party and the fact that I will not be using flowers to decorate the venue or as centerpieces.

I would love to have flowers for centerpieces but I simply do not want to spend the money that it would cost to do it. My centerpieces will be DIY and each have one pink floating carnation. There is a beautiful elegant white arch with multiple columns at the ceremony location set against a wall of greenery that will be in full bloom with flowers in July so I have decided to leave well enough alone. I will only be dressing the arch in tulle that costs $100 from the hotel.

My price quote is $428.04 and includes the following:

• Bridal Bouquet $110.00
• Attendant Bouquets 4 @$40.00 each
• Mom's corsages 2 @$17.99 each
• Groom Boutonniere $14.99
• Groomsmen, Dad's, officiant Boutonniere 7 @$9.99 each

I feel just a little bit indulgent and excessive at the thought of carrying a $110 bouquet. I mean, do I really need a prop that expensive? One I will carry down the aisle then toss over my shoulder and send home with someone else. I did not order a "throw away" bouquet. I was hoping for $80 and do not feel that I have requested anything too elaborate. I don't like cascading. Good thing because they cost even more. I chose a round bouquet with all light pink roses and baby's breath throughout which I love. It will have some ivy around the edges for finish and a white satin ribbon around the stalks with white pearls running down it. And that's all folks. The range she gave me for the bouquet was $110-$140 so of course I asked for the lower end. However many roses $110 will get me should be enough.  The attendant bouquets have a lot more greenery and a few different kinds of flowers in it with names I can't remember, including Carnations in different shades of pink and will be tied with a black ribbon. One benefit of having a smaller bridal party-less flower expenses.

I didn't originally think about all of the extra corsages and boutonniere's for the mom's, dad's and officiant/friend but I want each of them to have one and as with everything else it just adds up. The thought has crossed my mind to try to do DIY some of it. I don't know if I am ambitious enough to do it all myself but if I throw the attendant bouquet's together myself I'm pretty sure I could do it for less then $160.

I have a co worker who does flowers on the side as a hobby. I might be able to have her do all bouquet's  and then I would only have to order the boutonniere's and corsages from Allen's which might save me money if she could do it for less then the $270 quoted. Fifty Flowers.com has some DIY Wedding combos I could play around with. I have also found some reasonable priced wholesale flowers online at Growers Box and Blooms By The Box but I will ONLY pursue this route if it will save me significantly more money otherwise I might as well save myself the time and worry and just leave it to the professionals.

We shall see. Either way I am still under my original budget and overall $428 for bridal party/parent flowers doesn't seem to be all that bad considering what it could be. I am really happy with my selections. The lady who helped me didn't seem pushy and it was not some high end boutique shop. After browsing online I think the prices are reasonably low and competitive.