How 'bout That Election?

I'm a mail voter, so my ballot bumped around the house and my purse for a few weeks while I pondered my selections.  I figure, what is good for my job is probably going to be good for me, so I normally follow my employer union recommendations on state propositions, education boards, and city officials unless I have reason to do otherwise.  I started with that, but there were  still quite a few empty bubbles.

I read through the remaining propositions in the voter information guide and got overwhelmed.  Some of them are clear cut.  I am either for repealing the death penalty or I'm against it.  I understand what the death penalty is and have a generally clear grasp of implications on both sides.  I either believe that marijuana should be legalized or not.   I have strong opinions on background checks for ammunition sales.  I've heard enough information and am familiar enough with these hot button issues to make informed decisions. 

Others are more complicated.  Should elected officials use their authority to propose and ratify an amendment to the federal constitution overturning the the US Supreme Court decision in Citizens United v Federal Election Commission? Um.  I don't know.  And still others are just...well let's just call it a head scratcher for lack of a better word.  Prop 60 is about pornography.  Should adult performers be required to use condoms during the filming of sexual intercourse and require producers to pay for performer vaccinations, testing, and medical examinations?  My union did not take a stand on that one!!  So, how do I the average person approach this?  I know that condoms help prevent diseases and unwanted pregnancy.  I don't know too much about the porn industry, but I've heard that performers are required to test to make sure that they are clean.  The condom requirement makes things safer, and if testing is required perhaps it is fair to place the burden of expense on the producers.  See, I'm inclined to vote yes, because condoms are good, but what do the performers want? Maybe they are okay with relying on routine testing.  Am I really the best person to be in charge of helping to regulate the porn industry?

How can I, the average, not super in the know on politics voter be trusted to make such big decisions on anything?  

Here's another one.  I hear so sad stories of ill and elderly who can't afford the hundreds of thousands of dollars in prescription costs that keep them well, so proposition 61 to lower Rx expenses sounds good.  Then I hear a radio commercial claiming that only 12% would end up with lower costs and they would increase for everyone else.  The voter guide breaks it down for you alright.  Argument in favor of Proposition 61, rebuttal to argument in favor of proposition 61, argument against proposition 61, and rebuttal to argument against proposition 61.  What? There is a pro and a con for each side and for every action a consequence.  Some commercials claim that veterans are for it, others claim they are against it, and I still didn't know what bubble to fill in on prop 61.  So now what?  And there are so many propositions!  

Don't even get me started on the presidency.  It was the last bubble I filled in, but I had to make a decision.  I was running out of time.  Clinton and Trump are both embroiled in some pretty serious scandals.  Hilary Clinton lied, but so did Donald Trump, plus he's kind of a nut job, and isn't it kind of a given that politicians lie?  I hate to give them a pass, because if they want the highest position in all the land they should be better than that, but the idea that we can truly hold the president to a higher moral standard seems to have flown out the window a looooong time ago.  It almost comes down to who is the least immoral.  Our elected officials are humans after all, and humans are flawed.  They make mistakes, and they don't always do the right thing.  I don't always do the right thing, but then again...I'm not running for president.  I knew what my decision would be all along, but the constant mud slinging made me second guess my instincts.  

I realize that I am totally revealing my political ignorance by admitting I didn't know until I checked out my ballot, but did everyone else already know that Jill Stein, Gloria Estela La Riva and Gary Johnson were running for president?  I actually do recall hearing the name Jill Stein, but her name got lost in the Clinton/Trump storm and I guess I forgot.  How crazy is it that we already know they have no chance whatsoever, but stranger things have happened, like Trump making the ballot in the first place.

Anyway. 

I am only one person.  I don't know all the facts, I don't have all the information, and I certainly don't understand all the issues, but but my vote counts.  It is my right, and it is my privilege so I make the best educated decisions I can and hope for the best.  This election is so ugly, divisive, and terrifying all at the same time. It's tearing people apart.  I think most of us just want it to be over.

 
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Not a Honeymoon

I don't mind staying in three different hotels on one vacation because it makes the vacation seem that much longer.  The  Grand Waikikian is even better in person then it looks on the internet.  The hardwood floors, the kitchen, the bathrooms, and tons of space.  Everything about it was perfect.  My parents stayed with us, and everyone else was in different hotels.

Mom and Dad

This is our fourth time to Hawaii and hiking was pretty much the only activity I wanted to do, so after the four of us checked in we went directly to Manoa Falls Trail.   It was more muddy and slippery than it was challenging, but it was a good hike for the four of us.

older sister and nephew

This is the sister who claims she doesn't like to travel.  How is she my sister?  I got a shirt, but her trip souvenir was two new tattoos! Saying no to travel is like saying, no to taking space away from the job and your every day wash rinse repeat routine to experience new and fun things.  It doesn't have to be as far as Hawaii, or even require an airplane, but travel is travel and I really hope that she has a new appreciation for stepping outside of her small town and doing something different. 

Baby M is not so sure about this whole beach day thing

I haven't yet mastered swimming, and have this odd fear of fish.  Learning how to breathe underwater and walk on the ocean floor with sharks was not on my wish list, so MJ took T's new hubby along and they had a fantastic time.  The rest of us spent the day at the beach.

the kids were done

The newlyweds were not rid of us yet.  Not a single day went by that they didn't see friends and family.  We were all within one mile of each other, so it worked, but it wasn't the same!!  Group activities take so long to get going.  Trying to coordinate dinner, or anything really was a bit of a nightmare.  It took forever for all of us to make it to the beach.  That night we were all starving and it seemed to take forever for everyone to be ready and to decide on a place that could accommodate all 8 1/2 of us.  We went looking for Round Table because the wait at Yard House was too long, and it turns out it was actually just Round Table Pizza served inside a place called Giovanni Pastrami.  Okay...that's clear as mud.  Don't call it Round Table when it's not Round Table!  We would have never found it if I hadn't asked a valet.

surf lessons

In addition to scuba diving MJ also wanted to try surfing so he signed up for a lesson.  He was the only one in his class that actually was able to stand up and he was super sore and exhausted after he was done.  I guess surfing is pretty hard.  You see those two girls on the right?  They had a full face of make-up.  Both of them! Why do people do that?

We got in another beach day and a pool day before we had to go home.  My parents left very early Wednesday morning.  I cried.  My sister and nephew left Thursday afternoon.  I cried.  T and her husband took off on Thursday.  I cried.  What the heck is wrong with me?  We left on Friday evening.  I didn't cry, but I wanted to.  We stretched our trip out to the max; nine relaxing days...and somehow it still seemed like it wasn't long enough when we left.

Oahu was our honeymoon six years ago, and it is great but my only complaint, is that you don't get that quiet tropical island feel you expect from Hawaii.  We got that feel in North Shore, but Waikiki is very populated.  There are freeways, tall buildings, and a lot of chain restaurants and shops.  We still haven't made it to the big Island, but after hearing that the beaches are volcanic ash, I'm not so sure I want to.  Honolulu is still a great vacation, and we enjoyed it, but the next time I go back, it will be Kauai or Maui.  Kauai because it is so remote, and Maui which is not quite as remote, but has Road to Hana.  They are by far my two favorite Islands.

I don't know how he survived, but MJ traveled from Germany half way across the world to San Diego just a day and a half before we left for Hawaii.  He was tired, but he adapted pretty well during the trip.  We did a red-eye out of Honolulu and arrived in San Diego on Saturday morning.  I unpacked my suitcase so he could fill it back up.  He was home for five hours before I was driving him back to the airport, and he had to be back at work bright and early on Monday.  I'm so glad he was willing to do all that travel in such a short amount of time and that he was able to make it work with his schedule.

I cannot be without vacation in my future.  You know what that means? Time to start planning the next one.  It is not a honeymoon when your friends and family tag along so T and Tom are doing the same.

Oahu #1
Maui
Kauai
Oahu #2

 
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My Little Sister's Wedding

So the short version, is that Hawaii was awesome.  It was the first time in a very long time that every member of our family has been on a vacation together.  A "real" vacation and not a road trip to visit family.  Even then, I think there were probably only two out of three siblings in attendance at the same time because with a fifteen year age span between us, there was always one who wasn't around. 

Now for the long version.  The trip can be broken into two parts.  Before the wedding and after the wedding.  We stayed in Waikiki for the first night and went to dinner with the in-law side of the family, and then headed to North Shore for the wedding weekend extravaganza that was my little sister's wedding.  North Shore is about an hour and twenty minutes from Waikiki.

Before the wedding T could barely make it to her hotel because they were running errands all day as soon as they landed in Honolulu, and then all day the next day before heading to Laie.  My parents had all kinds of wedding stuff to do too, and my mom traveled with an entire suitcase full of wedding gear.  I'm on the hot mess express every time I travel, and I distinctly remember the day before our wedding when MJ wanted me to come out with him and his family to Julian and wouldn't go.  I couldn't go.  I didn't have anything I needed to do, but I was too anxious to leave my lists and spreadsheets.  I would have been a mess, but not T.  Nothing phases her.  Not even a destination wedding during the first year of her child's life.  She had all kinds of wedding accoutrements shipped to Oahu that she never even got to see until we checked in on Friday.  There was all kinds of chaos as everyone arrived and started unloading cars.  Before long, our house was full of boxes and the kitchen packed with food...most of which was not for us.  When I asked my mom if they picked up any food that was not for the wedding, she looked around in confusion and said no...I guess not. 

My favorite part about Tiki Moon Villas that weekend is that we were all together.  The property has five bungalows and they were all occupied by friends and family of the wedding so we were neighbors all weekend long.  My family had one place to ourselves and the bride and groom had their own place.  Most of her friends were steps away.  It was the ideal set up so we could spend more time together, and be available when my little sister needed help with baby M or anything else.  She was too busy to do anything!  She needed a lot of help, so I'm glad we were so close.

My second favorite part was the outdoor shower.  Who knew how amazing it would feel to take a shower outside?  I don't know what it is, but being outdoors while naked is great.  I really enjoyed feeling the fresh air and seeing the sun while I scrubbed down.  It just felt good, and it was convenient, because the house had one bathroom to share.  I showered inside once, and then it was outdoors for the rest of the weekend.  I loved it.

Bride getting ready

We waited too late to start getting ready.  Or something.  One minute we were tying tags to the never ending pile of wedding favors, and the next thing I knew it was a race against time to finish my make-up and finish curling my sister's hair.  Meanwhile, MJ was chilling in the room catching up on TV shows.  Sounds just like our wedding day when I didn't have time to eat, but he had time to forget his tux and have drinks with his groomsmen.  The bride had a hair and make up artist come, so she was on schedule, but the rest of us were rushing.  We ran over with the curling iron to finish hair, but none of us made it in time to be there when she put on her dress.  The officiant was trying to get us together, but D was still in her robe, my mom was pinning my dress up in the back, and my dad was nowhere to be found.

How do you get that scene in the movies where the wedding party hangs out in their matching outfits laughing, drinking wine, and soaking in the enormity of what is about to happen?  I may never know.

My nephew the ring bearer

There was no rehearsal.  The bride was so laid back she didn't care where the boutineers were pinned, how we got out there, or how we came back.  She didn't even care that much about what dresses we wore.  The officiant asked us who the maid of honor was.  The bride didn't know so my older sister was elected on the spot because she was born first.  The officiant gave us a crash course on when we were supposed to start walking, and we sent my nephew down the aisle with the ring.  "Walk to the front, find grammy, and sit down."  I think we sent him out too soon because there was no music during the first half of his walk.  He stopped and gave a deer in headlights look, but we told him to keep going, and the ring made it safely down the aisle.

Bridesmaids

Bride and Groom

She looked so pretty!  The look on his face when he saw T and their sweet baby girl with a flower crown walk down the aisle brought tears to my eyes, and I had to fight off a big happy ugly cry.  That baby is a mama's girl.  One of my sister's friends had to grab crying baby from my mom or else she would have missed the whole ceremony.  There were a few blunders and giggles as the bride and groom proceeded through the ceremony, but nothing major, and in the end they were man and wife.  She did good.  He's  great guy, and we all love him.

Mom, Dad, and baby M until she got fussy and got passed off to me

When the wedding cake arrived I thought that maybe they forgot some of the frosting, but it turns out this is what the bride wanted.  It was simple, and different.  Rustic, to match her theme.  I think it turned out really pretty, but did it taste good?  YES.  We were so happy to have some the next night.  The caterers used our kitchen for prep and were nice enough to leave us a ton of left overs from dinner too.

The rest of the day went by just as fast as it started.  We ate a delicious family style dinner.  We ate cake.  Then there were speeches, and I still can't believe I volunteered to speak.  I do not do such things.  I do not!  Maybe it was the alcohol or the intoxicating humid Hawaiian air, but something prompted me to grab the mike to say a few words.  I wasn't even nervous, and I don't think it was terrible.  The night was warm, the drinks were flowing and we literally danced the rest of the night away.  I didn't waste a minute.  I was one of the first ones out there.  We started out with 98% of guest butts in chairs, but by the end of the night I looked around and every single person was dancing. 

Cousin and Mom

After the wedding EVERYONE could relax, for the most part.  T is a very ambitious bride.  Not only did she plan a Friday night Bar B Q, but she also wanted a Sunday morning brunch for everyone staying at the villas.  This  basically meant that my older sister, mom and I were in the kitchen cranking out waffles for a few hours because we had exactly one waffle maker but we pulled it off.  Afterwards we spent the rest of the day hanging out at the beach and playing with fun water toys like a 7 person raft and kayak's.  The villas are on a private beach that only residents have access to.  I have no idea what beach it was, but it was beautiful and we had it mostly to ourselves.

We checked out of the villas on Monday morning, and it was nice knowing that there was still more vacation to come.  It was moving day, because we sure did make ourselves at home.  I felt like we had been there much longer than one weekend based on all the food and boxes of stuff we had to pack up before we left.  T and her new husband rented an SUV, but there was so much wedding stuff they still didn't have enough space to take all their luggage back to Waikiki.  My parents trunk was packed too, so MJ and I took two suitcases with us for them to pick up later.

She pulled it off!  My little sister who insisted on wearing a black leotard every day for months when she was 3 is a married woman and a Mom.  Her family is complete, and I'm so happy for her. 

 
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My Battle with Insomnia

Not to be overly dramatic or anything, but guys, I am hanging on by a thread.  A thin, frayed thread precariously close to snapping.  My life is not in danger and there are far worse things to battle, but referring to this as my battle with insomnia feels fitting because I have been dealing with this off and on for a long time.  There is no rhyme.  There is no reason.  I go to bed just like I do every other night, except there is that one night I wait for sleep and it doesn't come.  Not that night, or the next, or the next.

A photo posted by Cece🌺 (@mahoganydrive) on Sep 25, 2016 at 4:35pm PDT

I went to see the Lion King on Sunday.  It was so entertaining and so good.  Lions dancing, mountains moving and can you feel the love tonight?  I felt it.  It was great, but I could barely keep my eyes open.  Sunday matinee performances after a carb heavy brunch and a mimosa is enough to make anyone feel a bit drowsy, but I was fighting sleep almost the entire time.  Fighting so hard, that it was kind of painful, and that's been my life for going on two weeks now.  My eyes are glazed over and heavy inside my skull.  I don't quite have a headache, but the tension in my head pulses and the energy it takes to keep my eyes open when every cell in my body is telling me I need to sleep is nauseating.

I worked out six days last week.  This week I'm doing five.  Working out has been non negotiable for so long that I'm on auto pilot.  No matter how tired I am, I take off my clothes and wiggle into a sports bra as soon as I walk in the door. I might as well work out.  It's not like I can sleep instead.  I feel a temporary burst of energy right after I work out, but by the time I've showered and made my way downstairs for dinner, usually around 7:00ish, it's gone and I'm crashing all over again.

I'm exhausted, but I still can't sleep.

I get into bed and lay down from about 8:30-9:00pm to 6:20am, so according to my Fit Bit I'm sleeping, but I'm not! When my alarm goes off in the morning I'm already awake.  I think I'm going to be okay, but by the time I get to work I don't know how I'll make it.  Over the weekend I didn't wake up at 7:00am.  I gave up at 7:00am because I was just laying there.  I can't say I don't sleep at all, but whatever it is that is happening isn't restful because it doesn't feel like sleep when I am aware that I am laying in bed trying to sleep.  I don't know how you dream without sleeping, but it happens.  You know those dreams when you are aware that you are dreaming and you feel kind of like you are trapped in your own body watching yourself dream?  It was like that.  

My magic pill rx doesn't work and it's not because I've been taking it too much.  I learned that lesson the hard way last year after taking it Sunday through Thursday for months.  My body adapted.  It stopped working and I had to tough it out on my own for a while.  Since that bout ended I have only used it occasionally, so I fully expected it to lull me to sleep.  I finally tried melatonin two nights ago.  Who knew it came in flavors?  The strawberry smelled so good I wanted to eat it like candy but I didn't.  I swallowed one pill and hoped for the best.  No luck.  I doubled it up last night.  Some luck.  I felt like I actually went to sleep as in a not aware that I am trying to sleep deep sleep for at least a few hours, but I think I was awake by 1:00am off and on.  Valerian Root is on deck.  Might as well try everything.

I don't have kids.  I'm supposed to be able to sleep when I want! I cannot function like this for much longer, and yet I have no choice, but to function like this for as long as it continues.  Sleep deprivation is a form of torture.  This is torture!  I don't feel as zombie like as I did yesterday, but sitting in front of a computer for eight hours is not helpful, so it will be another long day.

Does anyone else struggle with insomnia on a regular basis?  What works for you?

 
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9 Funny First Date Dont's

Anyone else watching Married at First Sight?  If you aren't don't start.  It's addicting.  If you are, then you know it is a train wreck you can't look away from and that season four  appears to be the biggest disaster of them yet so far.  Each season there are three couples and out of the nine couples who have gone through the entire process only two actually worked out.  Two couples from season one are still married.  This was before all the people came out of the wood works trying to get paid for being on a hit TV show.  I think that is only one part of why these marriages aren't working.  The other part is that meeting someone sight unseen, marrying them, honeymooning, and moving in together in six weeks is just slightly insane!  Throw in cameras and "relationship experts" that could be matching for ratings and it's no wonder that most of the relationships crash and burn.

People are complicated.  So, so very complex.  I still think it's kind of a miracle that you can even find one person on this earth that you want to spend the rest of your life and with whom you can maintain a healthy happy relationship.  There are so many big things and so many little things to consider.  Some people can't even make it past one date and that is the main topic of this post.

I am obsessed with this morning radio segment called Second Try or is it Good-Bye that tries to get second dates for people, or at the very least find out why they got ghosted.  Most of the callers do not get that second date.  It seems that once people have made up their mind that they don't want to date someone it's hard to change it. 

This is the latest list of first date dont's.  The first set is here.  It's pretty funny.

1.  Don't post every single detail of your magical date and prince charming like kiss on Facebook.  Your date deserves not to have everything that happened (even if it was really good) outlined across social media.  YES, she got a second date with the agreement that she would be more discreet in the future.

2.  Don't tell the waitress it's her birthday inviting staff to rush the table and sing Happy Birthday when it's not her birthday.  She may or may not be comfortable with that type of charade and you don't know her well enough to know either way.  He realized that might be a bit uncomfortable for someone, and agreed not to do it again.  YES, to a second date.

3.  Don't invite someone over if your DVR is 90% full, your sheets are in a twisted lump because you didn't make the bed, and the sink is full of dirty dishes. This is a reflection of who you are as a person and 'aint nobody got time for that.  NO second date. 

4.  Don't invite a date in for some sexy time when there are stuffed animals covering your entire bed.  So many that you have to spoil the mood transferring them to another location to make room so they can stare at you with their beady stuffed animal eyes while you get hot and heavy.  It turns out some women find men with that many stuffed animals on display creepy. NO second date.

5.  Don't ambush him with "meet the parents" on your very first date.  This makes him feel set up and like he's being tested before he's even had a chance to date you.  She explained that it is a spot they frequent regularly.  She chose it so she would feel comfortable, not because she expected her parents would show up, and she would have felt rude not inviting them to join the date.  YES, second date accepted.

6.  Don't interrupt a romantic stroll on the beach to get your entire face painted like a tiger by a street artist.  It's just kind of weird when you are just getting to know someone, and now your date has to be seen with a half man half tiger.  NO second date.

7.  Don't wax poetic about your future yellow couch, in your future living room when you have literally just met.  It's a little intense.  What if he doesn't like yellow?  NO second date.

8.  Don't be rude to your waiter.  Furthermore, when you are called out on it don't admit that you have no problem with "putting someone in their place" when you feel it is appropriate.  This guy was clearly a major jerk.  Her date said the waiter was flirting and interjecting himself into their conversation and for those crimes he absolutely deserved to be treated like an intruder and did not deserve a tip.  NO second date.

9.  Don't choose a burger joint for your first date, order a salad and pair it with two jars of baby food stashed in your purse.  I totally get being health conscious.  I ordered a salad on our first date, but I do think the baby food is a bit much for a first date.  In her defense, she explained that baby food has less preservatives and she simply likes to maintain a fit lifestyle.  The guy was a real piece of work though because he kept making really rude jokes about how when you are on a diet you wouldn't eat dog food so why baby food and kept running his mouth, so that they couldn't even have a mature conversation about it.  She's better off without him anyway.  NO second date.

Good thing those people weren't on a weird reality show called married at first date.  Most of the offenses aren't that bad and are probably just things that shouldn't happen when people are forming first impressions and trying to decide if they like each other or not.  I dismissed people for far less when I was dating, and lucky for me I didn't do anything on our first date that sent MJ running for the hills. 

 
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How to Kill a Blog

How to kill a blog.  Just in case you were wondering, since most blogging tip posts cover how to grow your blog.  I'm doing something a little different.

Well, one thing is for certain.  I really know how to kill a blog, besides all the other things I've already been doing for years.  I did one other thing that might not be the best idea.  When you have been blogging under the same url for seven years, changing it is most certainly the kiss of death.  Why would anyone switch from one blog spot to another blog spot anyway?  Switching from a blog spot to a dot com, well that totally makes sense in the blog world these days.  If you haven't already come out like gangbusters with your own domain to start at some point, once you get your blogging legs you switch to the dot com.  You hire someone to help you make the switch, and there is a re-direct and all of these things that are supposed to help minimize your drop in traffic.  Or so I've heard.

I went from blog spot to blog spot because having a blog name that didn't match my url has bugged me.  Always.  When I first started blogging, I picked becauseeverybodyhasastory because it was available, and it seemed to fit what I was doing at the time.  Just telling my story, which I still am.  Then I changed my blog name four times.  Ready for this?  Frugalista Getting Married, became Frugalista Married; so embarrassing!, became Pink Sunshine, became Mahogany Drive.  I actually thought Pink Sunshine was the one, but I hesitated to switch the url because well...what if it wasn't?  Also, I didn't want the hassle and I worried that I would lose any hard earned follower I ever had.  Well, Mahogany Drive is 100% most certainly the final final name forever and ever.  I know this for sure, and it was tolerable at first that the url didn't match until it wasn't.  Until I couldn't stop thinking about how it was way, way too long, and how if I ever decided to tell anyone I know what my blog name actually is I wanted it to be just one thing, so one day I changed it to Mahogany-Drive.blogspot.com.  Then I thought, oh maybe I should have let people know before the old url and every trace of my blog disappears.  Sometimes I forget that there are people out there who may actually like my blog and might wonder if it was gone or they never got any new updates after a while.  I was able to reclaim the old url to add an updated url post and that was really all I could do. 

As a blog spot blogger it's easy enough to change your blog name a million times if you want to.  All your links remain intact.  Nobody has to update their feed readers.  Google recognizes the switch pretty quickly, and because the url hasn't changed there is no total break in traffic.  Switching your url however, is another story, and even as I was thinking that I might regret it, I knew I had to do it anyway, because it was bugging me and I couldn't leave well enough alone.  I'm pretty sure that half the traffic I was getting was spam bots anyway, so in that respect having a new url is like a clean slate.  It's also a clean slate for people reading your blog which is good and not so good at the same time.  I figure, if they like my blog, they'll update their readers, if they don't then who needs 'em anyway right?  In this internet world where numbers are everything I was getting a numbers boost from followers who don't read, but again, who needs 'em anyway?  I am not a blogger for money, so traffic is and should be a secondary concern, but damn it sucks that when I google my own blog name it doesn't show up on the first page like it used to.  Bummer.  I can say I blog for me all I want (and I do), but I'd be lying to myself if I said I didn't want somebody to read it.  

So, why don't I want my own domain?  This may sound really weird, but I have this vision of something happening to me.  Anything bad, where I'm not well or where I am too preoccupied with something bad to think about the expiration of my domain.  I miss the deadline to renew and my entire blog disappears.  Or, when I die, maybe a little morbid, but c'mon we all know it's going to happen, and don't pay that bill my entire blog disappears.  Honestly, I don't even know if that's how it works, but with a blog spot I don't have to worry about that.  I do nothing year after year and this blog is here.  I don't have to be fully responsible for hosting issues.  Every year people who don't profit from their blog or don't blog as much as they used to have to think to themselves...do I really want to pay for another year of my domain?  I don't want to have that thought every year.  I blog a little or a lot, pay nothing, and my blog is here.  I don't have to do anything, and I don't have to rationalize the expense or wonder if it is really "worth" it.  I remember when bloggers first started saying that having your own domain makes you look more professional.  I was that blogger thinking...for what?  Why do I need to look professional?  Why do I need business cards, a newsletter, and a media kit?  Well, now I know.  Blogging has turned into a money making empire for some.  Having your own domain supposedly helps increase traffic and SEO and all of those other things that I have mostly ignored.

So I asked myself.  What would make me happy despite all of the inconvenience and hassle that goes along with it?  The answer was switching my url, and so I did.  Anything I ever linked on twitter, or Pinterest is dead.  Any links I have ever put within my blog posts is dead.  I updated a few links on Pinterest, and in some series posts and recent posts, but I have published 726 posts so I'm not gonna get 'em all.  Bloglovin' was easy enough to switch without disruption, but anyone who ever got updates in blog reader or any other readers I don't  know about will not.

As far as google is concerned this blog doesn't even exist anymore, but you know what?  My blog is not dead to me.  Hello out there, I'm still here! I'm only a blog spot blogger.  I don't make money, I don't get free stuff, and I don't have a gazillion followers.  I also don't have to pretend  Scotch-Brite's new disposable toilet scrubber has totally changed my life.  I do show up here to write things because I love to write things so I'll just keep doing that.

Hello out there, I'm still here.

 
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When Your Husband Gets His Own Apartment

It's a bit unsettling when you find out that your husband is getting his own fancy apartment.  It's weird to think of him paying rent on a separate home, sleeping on sheets I will never wash, while living in a place I may never see.  A place that is not our house where we live, together.  I've been replaced with a weekly cleaning lady so I think he's going to come home more spoiled then he left.  I know it's because of work and is only temporary, but still.  It's kinda weird that he's living the downtown high rise pedestrian lifestyle dream in a faraway city without me.

A photo posted by Cece (@mahoganydrive) on Jul 30, 2016 at 7:32pm PDT

You'd think I would have been prepared when he left, but nope.  I wasn't.  Not prepared at all, because emotional limbo is no kind of preparation at all.  It's one thing to be told something is happening, but until you have a date being strung along for seven months causes nothing but turmoil.  I went on two trips, not really knowing for sure if he'd still be there when I got back.  Any day now. He's still here.  Departure date unknown.  He's still here.  The 15th.  He's still here.  Any week now.  He's still here.  No information, no news, no date.  He's still here.  Next Friday.  He's still here.  My friend said, well at least you have a date now, but what she didn't understand is that we've had several dates since January and yet...he's still here.   He got paid to sit in his bean bag for the month of January, and had his last day of work twice and went back by the time he finally left.  Of course I was thrilled to have him as long as I could, but the uncertainty and the inability to plan was maddening.  I quit working out after I got back from Vegas.  I just wanted to be around him.  I didn't want to be rushing from work to home to exercise to shower to dinner to bed during his last days here.  We finally got word from the Army, that he was leaving for real for real, just days before he hopped on a plane.  And of course it fell on a day I was supposed to be out of town.  I mean, who can realistically pack up their life to live abroad with a few days notice and not lose their mind?  Not me.  Oh no.  Not me, but fortunately I'm not the one who had to do it and MJ keeps it cool.  Somehow he keeps his wits about him and gets on with it, meanwhile I'm an angry hot mess over the entire situation.

He finally gets to book a flight and then it gets canceled.  Now he is leaving in the afternoon instead of the morning so I can't even drop him off at the airport.  Had I known he was leaving that day I wouldn't have made plans to be in L.A. all day, but nobody could give us that key piece of information until it was too late.  Skipping it would have given me about four extra hours with MJ and allowed me to take him to the airport, but then what?  The outcome is the same.  My husband is leaving.  The good-bye will happen, and there is no getting around it.  So I left for LA as late as I could and cherished the time we had together that morning.  I think it was harder saying good-bye at home because we didn't have the TSA airport drop off rules nudging us along.  I had to walk out of the house, leave him there, get in my car, drive away, and when I got home he would poof be gone.  So I hit the road for LA.  I watched my cousin perform in a three hour long Debbie Allen Dance Academy Summer Intensive recital and enjoyed dinner with my family.  I was just fine, until I walked in the door and burst into tears because he left Kohl's cash for me on the counter.  Then I cried when I smelled fresh Island breeze scent because he plugged in the wall flowers we picked out at Bath & Body Works yesterday before our last date night.  Pizza.  His choice.  Then I cried some more because the laundry was folded, and just when I thought I couldn't possibly cry any harder I cried because he left the sweetest handwritten note on my nightstand.  He was long gone by the time I got home last night, but I could still feel his presence.  He was just here.

The downtown bachelor pad

Timing is tricky because Germany is nine hours ahead, but we text all we want on WhatsApp for free and I look forward to Face Time.  I'm not the type that needs to talk to him daily, but I do need proof of life every other day and get ansty if I don't get to see his face for too long.  I need a picture, Face Time.  Something.  When we stay connected in some way I can kind of pretend we are still hanging out.  Like, maybe he's not really living in his very own bachelor pad in another country 6,000 away.

One month down, four to go...unless they need him to stay longer.  But of course we won't have an answer on that for a while.

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No Diet Plan Can Save You

Now that the Olympics is over, I guess I have to blog about something else.  I had a dream last night that the Final Five were my friends, and I got to touch their medals.  They were staying at my house, and I waited there for them while they went to compete and then we were supposed to go out afterward.  I think the end of the Olympics is really hitting me hard! I haven't blogged about my fitness journey for a while, but I've been at it for going on nine months now.  I'm no Olympian, but building strength, and sticking to a challenging workout schedule makes me feel like an athlete.

To recap January and February, I did a pretty hard core 8 week challenge I found on Instagram.  I got and exercise plan that included weight lifting and cardio, plus personalized macro support.  It was exactly what I needed to get motivated, get results, and find out what the heck I should be eating.  I could work out 'til the cows come home, but nothing would change until I fixed my nutrition.  I worked out five days a week for seven weeks without losing a single pound.  I was exhausted, discouraged, and frustrated, but determined to see it through.  It's hard to keep going when you can't see change in the mirror or on the scale, and this is the part where I really learned how important it is not to get impatient and give up.  I felt like I was getting nowhere, but in that last 1 1/2 weeks I finally lost weight.  It was only 3 lbs, which isn't much, but when I looked at my side by side before and after pic I was shocked to see that there was real change even though I couldn't see it.  My clothes were fitting looser, and I lost an inch in my waist and almost two inches in my hips.

I'd been struggling for so long that I approached it with an all or nothing now or never attitude.  I needed to make this happen now.  That's why I started early, and why I was 100% perfect in my diet, during those first four weeks.  The person doing my meal plan encouraged a weekly cheat and a weekly dessert that could be on the same day, but I didn't introduce weekly dessert cheats (if I wanted it) until after four weeks, and waited eight weeks for my first actual cheat meal. 

A photo posted by Cece (@mahoganydrive) on Feb 19, 2016 at 7:57pm PST

 
March to May I did Kayla Itsine's Bikini Body Guide 2.0 week 13-24.  I did week 1-12 last year, and said I'd never ever do it again because it is so hard, but I needed hard.  I needed results and that was all there was to it.  During the first few weeks I thought, I must be in really good shape because it isn't so bad, but I don't care what kind of shape you are in it just gets harder and harder until the point where you feel like you are dying after almost every workout.  Some of the ab circuits aren't so bad, but every single leg workout and total body work out is killer.  It was around week 8 that I felt like I couldn't do it anymore.  My body was exhausted.  I was doing 3-4 resistance circuits, plus 1-2 days of cardio to get in 5 workouts per week.  I was also taking a 3 hour writing class one night a week.  I felt broken emotionally and physically, but then something amazing happened.  It got better.  During the hardest workouts my body felt like this amazing machine that could do anything.  It didn't get easier, I got stronger.  I didn't get as tired on the treadmill.  I was attacking those leg workouts hard, and getting that mythical endorphin rush that everyone talks about.  I embraced the pain, and got a natural high pushing my body as far as it could go.  I felt myself getting stronger and stronger every week.  Again, I didn't feel that I was making any drastic changes in the mirror, but wanting to maintain that strength and continue to build on it motivated me to keep going.  The intense workouts pushed my old lady knees to the limit.  I got the dreaded fluid build up in one of my knees during the last four weeks so I had to space out leg circuits to compensate, and sometimes I couldn't go as hard, but I never missed a workout.  I was so excited to be done, and it felt like such an accomplishment to finish it out.  I lost another inch in my waist, half inch in my hips, and 4 lost more lbs over the course of that 12 weeks.

My body needed a break, so I took an active rest week where I did yoga, Pilates, walked, and avoided all things HIIT and cardio.

A photo posted by Cece (@mahoganydrive) on Jun 19, 2016 at 1:28pm PDT

In June I added an extra day and worked out six days per week.  I went to the gym for cardio one day per week and did circuit training type exercises the other five.  The circuits were a combination of BBG and ones from my 8 week challenge, but no real schedule which was nice after five months of regimented workouts.  By the end of that month I dropped 2 more lbs and lost a little bit more in my waist and hips.

This is about the time when I got a bit more lax with my diet.  I had no choice, because we went to Delaware for six days.  It was the longest I had been away from diet and exercise plan so I was a little worried that all of my hard work would be undone, by vacation eating and inactivity, but also knew that I had to be realistic.  Life happens and that's okay.  I can't be perfectly on plan all the time and I shouldn't feel like I have to be or else I'll get fat.  When I came back from the trip only 0.7 lbs heavier than when I left, and it disappeared within a day, I knew all my hard work was paying off.  It took me almost 2 1/2 years of hell but my metabolism recovered, and I finally started to feel a little bit better about my body and progress. 

A photo posted by Cece (@mahoganydrive) on Jun 29, 2016 at 9:31am PDT

I consider July a lost month for working out because I only exercised about ten days of it.  I had two long weekend trips for Olympic Trials and Las Vegas that automatically knocked out 10 days of exercise.  After Vegas I didn't go back to exercise right away and it turned into a much needed 10 day exercise break.  Not an active rest week.  A total break.  Not even a walk.  I still meal prepped, but didn't worry too much about hitting macros perfectly.  There was a lot going on, and I needed it.

My short term feel good about my progress goal was Las Vegas last month.  Mission accomplished.  I felt comfortable in my bikini and so so proud of myself for putting in the work to get there.  A friend just announced that she just lost 8 1/2 lbs in three weeks on Jenny Craig, and I've been working my butt off for that amount all year.  But do you know how expensive Jenny Craig is?  It's costing her about $800 per month. It took me seven months to lose 9 lbs.  That sounds terrible.  That's like .32 pounds per week.  Nobody wants to put in that much effort and lose that little, but I knew my body was going to be stubborn and I also knew I couldn't give up.  I had to be patient.  I had to use non scale victories as motivation.  I had to trust the process, and I had to do it the right way.  It took me a really long time to get here, but I finally learned how to nourish my body with food and not punish it.  I exercise consistently, and I eat real food consistently.  I learned the hard way, that starving is not the solution and there is no diet plan that can save you, because you have to save yourself.  You have to learn how to eat properly and understand that consistency over time is the only way. 

I was worried I would have a hard time getting back on the wagon after 10 days off, but Monday fell on the 1st, which feels like a fresh start and I started a new work out plan to keep me motivated.  Another Instagram find!  My fitness journey continues.

 
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URL Change

Hello Readers,

My blog url has changed to http://mahogany-drive.blogspot.com/

If you follow via Bloglovin' it has been updated.

If you follow me via Blogger Dashboard I think you will need to re-add it in order to continue receiving updates.  Click the add button on the right above the reading list.  This is how to add/delete if you aren't sure how.  Actually, I would love to know if my newest post from the new url showed up in your dash automatically so if that happened please let me know!  I researched it, but am not 100% certain how that will works.

If you have my blog linked anywhere in your blog in a post or on the blogroll I think you will need to re-add it with the updated url.  All my links are broken, and I'll lose readers.  I may regret this.

Other ways to Follow:

Subscribe via FeedBurner 

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Ending on a High Note: Individual Event Finals

It has been a fabulous week of gymnastics and now that it's over I don't know what to do with my life. I think I know exactly how Aly Raisman must feel. Well, not quite!  I haven't had the time to watch many other sports besides gymnastics so I'll start with that.  I have to mention how much I loved all of Team USA's leotards.  Talk about bling bling.  Those sparkly leotards cost anywhere between $700 and $1200 each and are covered in as many as 5,000 Swarovski crystals.  They were so pretty and every single one of them were patriotic red, white and blue.  It was nice not to have to hear anyone complain about them wearing Pink.  Click here for 9 fascinating facts about Team USA leotards.

Anyway, here is my last Gymnastic recap.  The US kicked some serious butt at these Olympic games and it was so exciting to watch.



There were a lot of tumbles in Vault, and not the good kind.  High difficulty is rewarded, so a few did vaults they can't do very well hoping the high start value alone will be enough to get them a good score.  All they have to do is put their feet on the mat before their butt and they get credit.  Oksana Chusovitina and Dipa Karmakar performed the handspring double front vault called the Produnova also known as the death vault.  The only person to ever do it well is the person who got it named after her.  That strategy did not pay off, and the ones who performed vaults they could land came out on top.  Finally, another country gets to medal.  

Vault
1.  Simone Biles 15.966  USA
2.  Maria Paseka 15.253 Russia
3.  Giulia Steingruber 15.216 Switzerland

So, we come to an event that does not include Simone Biles.  Gabby Douglas fell out of a handstand and had to muscle her way back up.  15.066 is a pretty decent score, but the competition is so tight and the gymnasts on bars so good, that it was pretty certain it wouldn't hold up.  Madison Kocian's routine was so beautiful.  I love her style of gymnastics on all events and I wish we could have seen her on more in Rio, but she made the team for bars and she hit that routine every single time.  She was short on a few handstands, but she stuck her dismount and took home a silver.  It wasn't Gold, but she is such a team player and so consistent with that routine I was really happy to see her have a chance to shine individually.  Aliya's routine was well done and had a high difficulty.  Interestingly enough, Aliya the queen won the exact same medals that she did in 2012.  Silver in team, bronze in the all around and Gold on bars.  She also got a bronze on floor in 2012, but did not qualify in Rio.

Uneven Bars
1.  Aliya Mustafina 15.9 Russia
2.  Madison Kocian 15.833 USA
3.  Sophi Sheder 15.566 Germany


Beam was really anyone's game just because it's so unpredictable and precarious.  If there is one event that Simone might give someone else an inch this is it, and give an inch she did.  Her foot slid in front of her on her front tuck and she put her hands down on the beam to hang on which counts as a fall.  Laurie's routine was beautiful.  Perfectly pointed toes, and dynamic execution.  She has equally as much power in her tumbling as her leaps.  She did a beautiful routine, but it wasn't enough to top Sanne Wever.  Her routine was gorgeous and had a lot of unique elements that you don't see from other gymnasts like s triple turn and a full twisting back handspring mount.  She connects three very difficult turns and does a split leap out of it.  She does the double full with her leg up at 90 degrees better than some do it on the floor.  On the beam; it's named after her.   I was really glad to the gold go to such an artistic and creative routine.  Even with that mistake Simone still got a bronze, so she basically gave it away.  Sanne and Laurie not only got Olympic medals, but they can also say they beat Simone the great.  Not many people can say that.

The lone Romanian for the entire Olympic games was 28 year old Catalina Ponor, and her selection was very controversial.  She came out of retirement to help the Romanian team on Beam and Floor, but then they didn't qualify a team to the Olympics.  They got one spot and they chose Catalina over Larisa Iordache who does all four events and has been the backbone of the team over the last four years.  It was Larisa who earned Romania that one spot by finishing 3rd All-Around at the 2015 World Championships.  She injured her hand and they didn't think she was making enough progress in her recovery so Larisa was the alternate.  Catalina won bronze on Beam and Floor at the 2016 European Championships, and had already been to two Olympics so they decided she had a better chance at a medal competing on two events than Larisa did competing on four.  She did not qualify into Floor finals so this was the one single chance for Romania to win a medal at this Olympics and she couldn't deliver finishing in 7th.  Maybe it was that awful flesh colored and black high neck dominatrix leotard!  It was a lot of pressure and she had a lot of wobbles and missed connections. 

Balance Beam
1.  Sanne Wever 15.466 Netherlands
2.  Laurie Hernandez 15.333 USA
3.  Simone Biles 14.733 USA


I love it that Aly and Simone wore the same leo for floor finals.  It was expected that they would go 1-2 just like the all around and that is exactly what they did.  What a perfect last event for them at the Olympic games.  Simone had a bit of a bouncy routine.  Her landings were not perfect, but her high level of difficulty and tumbling execution means that she can get away with it and still win.  I would have to say that Aly's routine was better in that she stuck every single landing, but some of her leaps aren't fully extended and she doesn't have the start value that Simone does.   It's so interesting to see how the reactions to bronze will vary depending on who you are.  For Simone, it was kind of like what is this thing but Amy Tinkler was so happy she was in tears and it was the best moment ever for her and Great Britain Gymnastics.

Floor Exercise
1.  Simone Biles 15.966  USA
2.  Aly Raisman 15.500  USA
3.  Amy Tinkler 14.933  Great Britain

Madison Kocian interview 

Bob Costas Interview with Aly & Simone.  I think they were on an oh my gosh we just had the best Olympics ever high.

Some 2016 Rio Olympics Gymnastics firsts:

• Oksana Chusovitina (Uzbekistan) who made event finals for Vault finishing 7th is the first gymnast to compete in seven Olympic Games.  She is 41 years old and plans to keep going.  That is insane.  
• The first Indian gymnast to qualify for an Olympic Games is Dipa Karmakar who placed 4th on Vault
• This is the first time Romania doesn't medal at the Olympic Games since 1976.
• Giulia Steingruber brought home the first ever Olympic medal in gymnastics for the Swiss with her bronze on Vault. Her 10th place finish was also the highest ever for Switzerland.
• Sanne Wevers brought home the first Olympic medal in gymnastics for Netherlands ever with her Gold on Beam.  Her twin sister Lieke Wevers finished 20th in the All-Around.  They have never been without injury at the same time so this is the first time they've competed on the same team.
• Simone won the first ever Olympic Vault Gold for team USA and she is the first gymnast to win three golds in a single Olympic Games. 
• I haven't fact checked this, but I think this is the first time that every single member of Team USA qualified for an event final.  Four out of five won medals.  Team USA was on fire. 

 
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