A Nice Weekend

After dropping Mj off at the airport on Thursday morning I was a little bit sadder then I expected to be.  He was gone pretty much all of 2009, is out of town at least one weekend a month and has already gone on his first of three long work trips for the year.  I'm used to this for the most part and tend to think I'm quite the pro at having him be gone but apparently that is not the case.  I could already feel myself starting to miss him on my way back to work. 

We wore this baby out but he didn't complain

I'm glad I had a nice diversion to keep me occupied this weekend.  I went up to visit my big sis on Saturday.  We always have a ball together.  I got to her house at around 12pm and we were out the door with my cute little nephew in tow by 1pm.  We did errands, a little shopping and went to dinner.  We split a 1,400 calorie Chocolate Brownie Obsession at TGI Friday's.  Yep-they were kind enough to put that awesome number right there on the menu for us.  Then, we finally headed back to the house.  My nephew was so good the entire time.  We took him in and out of his car seat a million times and he got loaded up into his stroller over and over again but did not cry or fuss even once.  I still can't figure out how we managed to stay out so long.  We didn't get home until around 9ish and when we did we got comfy and relaxed while drinking Moscato wine (our favorite) and eating Haribo gummy bears (another favorite).  We only made it until 11:30pm before we were so tired that we had no choice but to go to bed. 

Sunday mom and dad joined us at Big Sis's house for a Dad's day BBQ.  More wine, Turkey Burgers and a bunch of other yummy side dishes.  We have so much fun spending time together that I didn't really want to leave.  But alas the work week lies ahead so at about 7:45pm I loaded up my car and hit the road for the 1 1/2 hour drive home.   I unpacked, showered, called Mj then fell into bed.  The weekend was great but it went by way too fast as usual.  After work today I forced myself to the gym to burn off the weekend indulgences and was so SO glad to finally get home after a long day and have another Monday down.  I got into my jammies as fast as I could, grabbed some food and happily settled down for some HGTV.  The only thing missing is Mj.  I'm so tired!  I'm definitely going to bed early tonight.

Hangin' out with Sis

Me and Big Sis at Mom's house 
She's almost done losing her baby + weight!

I had a great weekend hanging with my big sister and the rest of my family.  Friday night I was on my own.  I stayed home and watched The Roommate.  It was a typical obsessed girl beats herself up for attention and snaps at the end kind of move but it was good.  Saturday morning I rolled out of bed and cleaned the house.  I'd put it off for a while so it had to be done.   One of Mj's friend's planned a baby shower for Saturday night.   Even though he is out of town I still wanted to go, but not by myself so Big Sis dropped my nephew at mom's and came down to spend the night so we could hang out and then she could come with me. It's so great having her nearby again.  We have already planned our next sister get together for next month up at her house.  We spent the day hanging out at my house talking about anything and everything and then went to the baby shower that evening.  The first of what is likely to be a flurry of baby shower's to come seeing as how everyone is turning up pregnant lately.  I'm not a big fan of baby shower's for some reason so I liked it that it was just a basic unisex gathering with food.  The only way you knew it was a baby shower was the baby themed cake, paper plates and napkins and the baby gifts.  No games at all.  There was some really good eats and we had a fun time.  It was kind of late but still, we did our best to stay awake after we got home but didn't make it long before we had to go to bed.

He changes everytime I see him. 

I've really been in my homebody mode lately, especially with Mj being gone.  I was going to stay home alone in my jammies after my sister left for my Mom's on Sunday.  But really.  Why should I spend the day at home alone in my pajamas when I can be with my family? Nice as that sounds I just did that last weekend.  Mom told me I should come up and she'd make whatever I wanted for dinner and I'm glad I did.   I got to see Mom and Dad and my little nephew who is as cute as can be.  DJ is standing up by himself now and has 4 teeth.  He'll be walking any day now.  We had Turkey Chili, Salad and Cornbread for dinner.  I only just started eating cornbread last year because I'm picky and had decided that I didn't like it which doesn't make too much sense because I love bread.  Anyways, I like it now and it was so good.

It was a little bit gloomy all weekend but the sun seems to have reappeared and I'm looking forward to a sunny three day weekend and Mj coming home.  I've missed him!  And not just because I had to take over the the plant watering and trash duties. 

Girls & Baby Family Weekend

Out at happy hour Friday night

When it comes to spending time with family there doesn't need to be a plan.  Just being together is enough.  Mom, big sis, and little sis came down and spent the weekend at our house while Mj was away at drill.  The bonus is that my little sis was able to fly down from SF and join us when we didn't necessarily think she would be here.  The only real set plan we had was for Friday night and we would just play it by ear for the rest of the time.  Friday they all met at up my house while I was at work.  Once I got off my sister's joined me and my friends for happy hour at one of our favorite hang out spots while mom stayed home and watched the baby.  We had a great time there drinking and eating then got home around 9:30pm and stayed up watching TV and talking until we couldn't keep our eyes open anymore and had to go to bed.

The girls

I woke up bright and early Saturday morning for no particular reason.  I was just so excited to have them all at my house. It was so cool to finally have a place big enough to invite them over to.  Mom, big sis and I did P90 Yoga and then we all got dressed to meet the carpet guy at my rental property.  Too bad he was a no show but we got a chance to take a peek into my recently vacated condo.  Sadly, it's a wreck.  After that we went back to my house and brought out the stroller so we could walk over to Outback steak house for lunch.  It's a short walk and such a perfectly beautiful sunny day that we wanted to get out and enjoy it a little.  We were too early!!  They don't open until 3:30pm so we walked to Blockbuster to get some movies stopping at 7-11 along the way to get Slurpee's.  We spent about an hour and fifteen minutes walking all together.  By the time we made it back to Outback we were all STARVING!!

We all got Slurpee's for the walk

Mom and little sis

We enjoyed a nice lunch then walked to CVS for a few things.  Back at my house we watched gymnastics that I DVR'd earlier that day.  It was the American Cup.  Mom is usually too busy running around to catch it and little sis (who is also a former gymnast) is usually at work so it was awesome that we could all sit there together and watch it.  After that it was movie time.  We got our popcorn, candy, wine and other munchies together and watched Life As We Know It and Love & Other Drugs back to back.  Big sis had to tap out and take the fussy baby up to bed but the rest of us managed to barely stay awake and finish watching the last movie.  For not really having any plans it turned out to be quite a full and fun day.

We love this kid. 

Sisters & nephew DJ

We lounged around eating breakfast, chatting and watching TV until late afternoon on Sunday.  There is never a shortage of things to talk about.  Then all too soon it was time for everyone to get moving and get dressed.  They had to get on the road and head home and I needed to go grocery shopping.  We stopped at Wendy's so they could grab a bite to eat.  I'm usually the one who isn't ready to eat yet so I just held the baby and snatched some fries for myself.  I wasn't even going to go but I just didn't want the weekend to end and was trying to spend every last minute with them that I could.  I was so sad to see them go.  I love spending time with them and I'm so glad that we got to do just that for an entire weekend.    I already started missing them as soon as they got into the car and drove away.  I love them so much!  I feel so incredibly lucky to have each one of them in my life and am glad we are so close.  We didn't do anything spectacular but it was still a spectacular weekend just because we were together. 

I LOVE Christmas

I don't care how old I get I always feel like a kid on Christmas morning.  As soon as we get out of bed it's time to open presents.  Do not pass go, do not collect $200.  Go to the bathroom if you must but after that the Christmas Carols are on and we are at the tree because it's present time!  I am almost more excited for him to open his then I am to open mine.  I got my i phone 4 early because my Razor was pissing me off so badly and I am so broke that I threatened to go out and get whatever free phone T Mobile was offering.  To avoid this tragedy Mj gave me my phone Tuesday and I am already madly in love with it.  He even got me the pink case t go with it.  I still had one more gift left for Christmas day.  I opened the box and the distinctive bag alone told me I was in store for a real treat.  As soon as I un cinched it my nostrils were massaged by the aroma of leather and my eyes feasted upon an absolutely exquisite black Coach Purse!!  He got me a great brown one two years ago which is still in great condition so it was time for a black one.  He wasn't sure if I would like the style but it was perfect.  He did an amazing job picking it out himself.  For someone without a wish list I think I did pretty good!  I got everything I've been wanting but has just been too expensive for me to go out and get for myself. 

YES!!  I love it.

Mia Collection Maggie handbag by Coach [Photo Source]

Mj loved his bike trainer.  It's basically a contraption that allows him to turn his actual bicycle into a stationary bike so he can exercise in the house or just outside without actually having to ride anywhere.  I also got him cycling arm and leg warmers and threw in some boring socks too just because he needs them.  

Our first tree and first Christmas in our new house

I love Christmas!  I was so excited to go up and spend the day with my family.  As soon as I walk in the door I grab DJ because I can't help myself.  He was so cute in his little "My First Christmas" Santa outfit.  

Grandpa and Dj

The guys go straight to the TV for the basketball game and my big sis and I head in to see if mom needs any help.  There is lots of chatting and sitting around until dinner time.  My mom just didn't really feel like inviting a bunch of people over so it was just us this year. Of course there was way too much food.  We all packed some to go.

Mom and Mj dishing it out

Big Sis, Mom, DJ

The gang

After dinner and dessert we exchanged gifts.  My dad had me for Secret Santa and got me this stylish animal print cap and scarf and some fuzzy socks.  My mom sent him off to the mall by himself to pick it out and he did an awesome job.  That he picked it and my mom didn't pick it and just put his name on it makes it so special.  Mom also got me an interactive gaming mat.  I'm not sure exactly what that is yet but it looks cool.

My dad picked it out for me all by himself!!

After dessert and presents my big sis, brother in law, Mj and I played Yahtzee.  When we were younger my big sis and I used to play this for hours and hours at a time while listening to and 80's band called "Men at Work."  I have absolutely no idea why we did this but I won't ever forget how much fun we had.  The only one missing this year was little sis so I called her on my brand new i phone and we did face time so we could see her and she could see us.  

Did I already say how much I love Christmas?  It is such a happy and festive time.  I woke up in such a jolly mood just because it was Christmas day.  Even the next day I am still feeling the glow.  I was in such a good mood in fact that I made pancakes for breakfast.  Mj just finished using his bike trainer and now he wants to know if he can keep his bike in the house.  Uh....no.  I plan to break out that exercise mat but today is basically just going to be a relaxing day after Christmas at home.

A cute little video of my nephew

Giving Thanks

This is the time of year that we all need to take stock of what we have in our lives that we are grateful for.  Making a list like this is probably harder for some then others.  There are a great many people in this world who are unhappy, struggling, and simply got a raw deal in life.   When I think about all the bad there is in the world out there I know that no matter how far I am from where I wish I was I am damn lucky to be where I am and have plenty to be thankful for.

• My husband:  I seriously don't know where I would be without this man.  He changed my life.  This time last year he was just coming home from a long 11 month separation.  I'm glad he's home for good...at least for now.
• My family:  I love them so very much.  I am grateful  that my big sis lives closer now for at least the next five years and that we will get to watch my nephew grow up and that my mom is the best mom I could ever ask for.
• My job:  I have been so hard on myself in the past for not "being" something better then I am.  But really, when it comes down to it I am lucky to have a job that I like with great health insurance benefits, all the holidays off AND that keeps the bills paid.  Getting a promotion has been a much needed boost for my self confidence and my wallet.  I can only be grateful for that.  There are people in their 6o's working low wage manual labor jobs that basically keep them in poverty.  How difficult must it be to get out of bed and face that every day? I am glad that I don't have to.
• My health:  I don't get sick a lot.  I don't put into my body everything I should.  I don't exercise enough and I am ever critical of it's appearance but even so it has never failed me. 
• My home:  Even when I was bursting at the seams in my tiny studio I was always grateful that I had a roof over my head.  Many people in this world dream of having any home at all and I feel so fortunate that we were able to buy our first house together.
• Finances:  Of course I wish I were rich but I am glad that my finances are in order enough to the point that I have good credit, money saved, and a 403b.  Despite what a big year we had with the house, wedding, and honeymoon we are debt free.  No drowning in debt or high interest rates for us.  I have always lived within my means and didn't have to learn that lesson the hard way.

I'll be spending Thanksgiving with almost my whole family.  We will miss lil' sis.  She couldn't make it down here again for today but hopefully we will see her at Christmas.   My cousin wanted to host this year so we will be making the drive up there to her house.  I am still in my pajamas and I'm looking forward to a wonderful day of relaxation and hanging out with family.  If I feel this relaxed now...wait until the food coma hits!!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

I'm An Auntie

Two new aunties!  Me and lil' sis

Isn't he just the cutest?  I am in love already! 7lbs 9 oz

Apparently there is nothing predictable about child birth.  Even when you schedule it to be induced.  My sister got to the hospital around 8:30am as she was told.  She didn't get her first round of inducing drugs until sometime after 10:00am and by 11:30pm that night was not dilated at all!  No contractions.  No nothin'.  We were all expecting this thing to get going but it was going very slowly and she was only going to be allowed liquids until after she has the baby.  She was uncomfortable, exhausted, starving and beyond ready to get this boy OUT!!

We left the hospital around 11:30pm when it was clear that nothing was going to happen any time soon.  So we thought.  We went home to get some sleep and about two hours after we went to bed we get a call from her husband that they are doing a C section.  Like NOW!  She had finally dilated to about 1" and was having some contractions after we left.  DJ was showing some signs of distress so without further delay they sent her into surgery.  We tiredly got dressed again and headed back to the hospital to wait.  We got some snacks from the vending machine to keep us occupied then proceeded to fall asleep in our chairs.  They took him out at 2:45 am.  They checked him out and one by one we got to see him.  And he is just precious.  He looks just like his daddy.  My sister is just fine and DJ is healthy and adorable.  It's just amazing.  I'm so happy for them.

We finally got to see our sister around 4:30am.  She was groggy and still high on pain killers.  We went home to get some rest around 6:00 am finally.  Then, went back to the hospital around 3:30pm so we could see him again and finally hold him.  So far he doesn't cry at all and right now he would rather sleep then eat.  I changed his diaper.  The last diaper I changed was probably about 20 years ago when my Lil sis was still a baby.  I left the hospital to go back home around 7:45pm.  I slept a little but my body did not appreciate going to bed at 6 in the morning when the sun is coming up so I was exhausted by the time I climbed into bed.  I took yesterday off but had to be at work at 7:00 am this morning. Thank goodness I am off tomorrow.

My sister gets to go home on Friday.  She slept here and there but she says she really needs about 8 hours of sleep to recover.  I don't think she's going to get it.  She is breast feeding so she has months and months of sleep deprivation ahead of her.  I'm sure it's so worth it to her when she looks at that sweet little face.  It's so great that she will be close enough to benefit from the support of her family.  We can't breast feed but there are plenty of other things we can do to help.

She's Having A Baby Alright

We got some awesome news last week. My sister will not be going to Vegas after all. She will be staying right here in So Cal! The military screwed up and when her hubby went to check in he was told, "You aren't going to Vegas." All of their things had already been shipped out there and now they have to get those back as soon as they figure out where they're going to live. Yes, it kind of threw them for a loop but I am really glad she is going to be so close.

Me and my big sis

Her baby shower was Sunday at my mom's house and it turned out really nice. We spent most of the time outside and basked in the perfect 72 degree weather. She got tons of gifts and hung out with some friends she hasn't seen in a while. My mom invited her friends from work and a few of my friends came. When I got home Mj asked me why I didn't bring him any food and I told him the truth. "We ate it ALL." And we enjoyed every bit.  I can't believe that this tiny little person who can't talk, walk or even sit up needs so many things!!! She's been wanting this for a long time and is so happy and I am happy for her.  And of course my mom is thrilled that one of us is finally going to give her a grandchild.

Presents!!

I think babies are cute and precious and all that good stuff but I am not really a "baby person." They give me a maternal pang when I see them and hold them but for the most part it usually ends right there. I've never wanted to baby sit or had an instinctive desire to be a mother for that matter.  I'm not sure if I'll ever have one of my own, but in about a week I will have a nephew which is totally new to me. I've not had too many babies in my life since my little sis stopped being a baby a long time ago so it will be interesting to see how how that's going to feel.

Next Tuesday is the big day and I'm so glad it's not me giving birth. I'm sort of using my sister as a "test case."   What a difficult pregnancy it's been for her from trying to get pregnant in the first place, to fibroid complications to gestational diabetes.  She is more then READY to get this kid out.  After getting the inside scoop from someone who shares my genes and interacting with a baby so closely related to me, if I find that this whole baby business seems to be way too much then it could really help me make up my mind.   It might make me want to have a baby less then I do right now OR there is that slim possibility that it could have the opposite effect.   In which case I'd then have to convince my husband and that would be even harder then convincing me. 

Quality Time With Big Sis

I have adequately mourned the passing of my wedding.  No more planning to be done.  No more "So, how is the wedding going?" inquiries or "Bride to be" comments.  That's been replaced with "How was the wedding?" which allows me the opportunity to reminisce and relive my princess moment again and again.  I have paid homage to the magical event by posting blogs and pictures here and on face book.   I have carefully documented and analyzed every moment and every emotion which I will have saved forever.  I have reveled in the awesome memories and gotten closure on my cake.  We got gifts and did a little house shopping with our loot.  Accordingly, I think it's about time I talk about something else.  Bummer. I loved my wedding and being "The Bride" more after the wedding then I did before and as much as I would kind of like to do it all over again I can't.  It's kind of a one time thing.  I am still waiting anxiously for the professional pics and the video my little sis is making for us which will undoubtedly inspire another round of wedding talk but sadly I guess it's time to move on with other topics of interest. For now.

This past weekend was spent with my big sis.  She came down and spent the weekend with me while hubby is out of town.  I wanted to spend some quality time with her before the baby is born and totally takes over her life-even more then he already has.  At 8 months she is about to pop and her belly is HUGE.  I got to really see and touch a pregnant belly up close for the first time.  It's surprisingly hard and it's amazing how her skin has stretched and her stomach has grown so much.  She is slow, tires easily, has swollen sausage feet, sometimes doesn't fit into booths, and can hardly reach her feet to put on lotion or socks.  She can only wear flip flops and sun dresses.  She can't sleep well and when the baby moves it feels like he's scratching at her insides.  Her thighs have developed cottage cheese for the first time ever and she has to give herself insulin shots and strictly monitor her diet.  Sounds a little bit like hell and I am in no rush to do any of that anytime soon and maybe not EVER. 

Saturday we saw Eclipse at the movies [even though she already saw it] and did a few errands.  Don't ask me how but somehow I managed to loose a 6 pack double roll package of toilet paper somewhere between Walmart and my car.  I went to the car to put all of my stuff in there while my sister stayed in the mall and when we got home later that day I realized the toilet paper was missing.  I know I walked out of the store with it.  Who looses a giant package of toilet paper in the parking lot?  Me.  We went to Denny's for dinner that night.  Apparently no one else quite recognizes what a true gem good old Denny's is aside from us so even though I can't get anyone else to go there with me anymore it was actually our top pick.  We stayed up late, well past her bedtime watching TV and talking up a storm.  There is no shortage of conversation or things to talk about when we are together.

Sunday we went to the mall so she could go to Mac Cosmetics and finally use the gift card I got her back in May for her B Day.  I had to re buy my toilet paper at Target.  So sad.  We went to dinner again-us sister's have never been into cooking-and then watched the movie we picked out at Blockbuster that turned out to be really bad.  We spent a lot of time hanging out on the couch in front of the TV.  It didn't matter what we did it was just nice to spend some quality time with my big sis again like we used to.   

Her dream of having a baby and being a stay at home mom is finally coming true. I am so happy for her and excited to have a nephew. This is the first baby in our family.  She finds out when she will be induced some time this week.  Things worked out about as well as we could have hoped.  She got to come to the wedding and mom has been loving having her back at home for a while.  She gets to stay out here and have her baby then her and her husband will be moving to Vegas where he got stationed which is a hell of a lot closer then where she was before.  She moved away 4 years ago and it's when we spend time together like this that I really realize just how much I miss having her around.  That might be the last time we get to hang out like that in a long, long time and it does makes me a little bit sad.  Her life is drastically changing but she will always be my sister and neither time nor distance or itty bitty babies will ever change that.

The Fair & The Fourth

Do we really NEED Chocolate Covered Bacon? UGGh!!

I love the fair and I think I've gone just about every year since I can remember.  We used to go as a family and now that I am older it's a tradition I've happily held onto and Mj seems content to go along with the program too.  I used to go for the rides but now I go for the food.  I have a wedding on Saturday so I did not get the chocolate covered bacon.  Yes, that's right.  Chocolate Covered Bacon!!!!!  You can even get deep fried butter and deep fried Klondike bars now if you so desire.  They have gone way too far if you asked me.  I got the delicious french bread pizza that I get every single year.  I pretended not to notice that the pizza place may actually have a store that's probably not too far from where we live.  It's easier to believe that I can only get this once a year.  It cost $8.16 at the fair and is probably a heck of a lot cheaper at their store but I simply don't need the temptation.  We headed over to the beer garden after that where we paid about $14 bucks for two beers and sat in the grass outside watching MMA cage fighting while we ate.  Random, I know.  You never know what kinds of things you will see at the fair which is one of the reasons I love it so much.

This year was a little different because we wanted to see a show at 7:30 pm instead of just doing the all day thing like I usually do.  We planned to get there late afternoon but got off to an even later start then anticipated and didn't have time to do a single ride or walk around as much as I would've liked but we still had fun.  At least Mj was here this year unlike last year when he was out of the country.  The Jeff Dunham show was pretty funny and entertaining.  We saw him 4 of his 6 hilarious characters.  I laughed through most of it.

Jeff Dunham with Crochety old "Walter" one of my fav characters of his

Saturday night after the fair we picked up my mother in law from the airport and then Sunday I picked up my big sis!  It was so good to see her.  She is growing another human being inside her body, her feet are swollen, and she has to take insulin shots now that she has gestational diabetes but she's still my big sis and it's nice to have her home.  All of us went up to my parents house for the 4th and spent a nice relaxing day there.

Me and my preggo sis

Monday my mother in law and I went shopping.  We got her completely outfitted for the wedding from head to toe.  I also found my shoes at Macy's.  They are exactly what I was looking for, they were on sale and I had a $10.00 off coupon so I only spent $32.00 with tax.  They are cute and comfy gladiator type Alfani sandals with a tiny 1/2 inch wedge.  I will be comfortable all during the wedding AND have a great pair of sandals to wear afterwards.  I also discovered this great store called Cotton On.  They are based out of Australia.  I am all about comfort and love this store because they have stylish clothing all in cotton and some great prices.  It was not planned but I was able to get my little shopping fix and spend only $23.00 because I found a navy and off white stripped cotton dress for $9.00, a black and white skirt for $5 and a great black shirt for $5.  The dress is cotton, casual and will be perfect to bring with me on our honeymoon.  SCORE!  It's the first shopping I have done that wasn't for the house in a long time.  I'd almost forgotten that stores had other sections besides housewares.

I had a great weekend.  The bad news is that I'm back at work right now and tired but the good news is that It's a two day work week.  I'm taking Thursday, Friday, and Monday off to prepare for and recover from the wedding.  Can't wait.

Good Family News

Originally my big sister was supposed to be in my wedding but instead she decided to get pregnant.  I mean really, how could she do this to me?  Only joking!   My sister is in her late 30's and she really wanted a child but was having a heck of a time getting pregnant and staying pregnant so I was really happy for her that it finally happened but crushed that she wouldn't be at my wedding. Not just because I want her there but because she already misses out on so much being far away from the family since moving away four years ago and this was just one more thing. A big thing at that. As it got closer and closer to the wedding things started happening that gave us hope that she would make it but always the pessimist I didn't count on it.  About a month ago she booked her flight and made it official! Not only will she be here on Sunday in time to come to the wedding but she will be staying out here until after she delivers her baby next month. My big sis is finally coming home and I can't wait to see her. Next challenge. Finding this very pregnant mama a dress!  Mom, Dad, Big Sis, Middle Sis (me) and Lil sis have not all been together in one place in about two years so it's going to be great to all be together again.

The other bit of good news came Wednesday. I got a message from my mom saying that she had news and to call her when I could. "News" is such a cryptic word.  It could really mean anything good or bad. My mom got her lab results back and she is a match for my dad. We really weren't expecting this because they don't have the same blood type.  I actually do and we all figured that if there was one person in the family that might be able to donate it would be me.  This is only the first step in a long series of testing that needs to happen prior to any kidney donation but it's a really good sign. My dad is #1 on the kidney donor list now and after two false alarms and a year on dialysis he is READY.   One could become available any day now but if that doesn't happen it's good to know that my mom can give him hers.

I am so looking forward to this nice long three day weekend. Tomorrow Mj and I are going to the fair-which I do every year and have always loved.  We pick up Mj's mom tomorrow night after that.  Then, I pick up my big sis on Sunday morning and then we will all head up to my mom's house for the 4th of July.  I don't know if we'll see fireworks but I know I'll be having lots of fun. 

I only have to work two days next week which is absolutely wonderful and then I get married!!

Clubbin' With Mom & Dad

"Hey Dad, I want skittles," I yelled out the window as my dad got out of the car and went into the convenience liquor store.  There is something about sitting in the back seat of the car with mom and dad in the front that reminds me of being a kid again.  I constantly hounded my dad for candy and barbies as a child so I thought it would be funny to ask for skittles which was always my favorite.  My dad comes back and tosses in a bag of skittles and one of those cute little mini alcohol bottles of  Gin with lime.  I didn't used to get liquor with my candy as a child but well, I'm not a kid anymore.  It's 10:15 pm and to celebrate Father's day mom, dad and I are going out clubbing.  "Drink up," he says as he hands one to my mom.

There is nothing traditional about my father.  He makes no apologies.  He thinks, says, and does whatever he wants to and could care less about who's looking or what anybody thinks about it.    "Dad, what do you want to do for Father's Day?"  

"Nothing.  Don't buy me anything because you know I'm not into that and don't go out of your way to come up here or spend any money." Then he went into his usual rant about commercial holidays and how it's just about making money and he doesn't need one day to celebrate anything.  My dad always tries to act so rough and gruff but we all know there is a softie in there somewhere.

I was going to be up there Saturday and was thinking I could spent the night and do breakfast in the morning so he could get to work and I could get home to take care of the millions of things I have to do. He said that all he wants is for his girls to be happy.  He doesn't want or need anything else for Dad's day.  He has his routine on Sunday's.  He gets up, goes to the gym, then goes to the barber shop for work and normally doesn't get back until evening.  He really didn't really feel the need to interrupt his schedule and with everything going on with wedding planning and buying a house he didn't want me to have to do anything else.  I have learned over the years that it is almost useless to argue with him.  He is more set in his ways and stubborn then anybody I know.  So when mom suggested that we just spend time together on Saturday because I was already going to be up there I agreed.  We would eat dinner together then go out.  Mom and I had a make up consultation for my wedding so we would already be glammed up.  Perfect!

So, that's what we did.  The consult took longer then expected so we didn't have time to cook but we did pick up some delicious food from a local Soul Food restaurant and ate that at home.  Dad doesn't drink anymore since he's been on dialysis but mom and I had some wine.  I was already getting tired.  I don't go out at night much because most of the time I find that I'd just rather be at home in my pajamas at that hour but we said we'd go out so go out we did.  It's a small town and there aren't too many any hot spots to choose from unless you want to head south about 40 minutes closer to where I live.  The Flying Bridge seems to be the only game in town so that's where we went.  The ONE night my parents and I decide do go out it's closed so we ended up at a dive bar called McCabe's.  I used to go there in my single days long ago and hang out mostly because there wasn't anyplace else but I never expected I'd find myself there ever again let alone with my parents.  Not much had changed.  It's still a dive bar with lots of random weird people inside but dad new the guy at the door so at least we didn't have to pay a cover.  We chatted, people watched.  My mom and I were being shy but dad put an end to that by dragging us on the dance floor and we had fun out there. 

I thought to myself for a moment how bizarre it is that I am out dancing with my parents on a Saturday night at a bar but that's something I love about my family.  We just are who we are.  My parents are on the other side of 50 but they still like to get out and have their fun and I can go right along with them  and there is nothing weird about it at all.  I was probably more tired then both of my parents and I'm supposed to be the young one!  We had a really fun time hanging out and doing something different together.  It was NOT the traditional Father's day outing but we certainly enjoyed it and that's really what it's all about.

Busy Fun Mom's Day

Of course we still had some business to take care of from Saturday so Mother's Day started with that.  We stopped at the new house to measure the great room area so we could determine if the sectional we ordered the day before was going to fit.  Good thing we did because apparently the 12' long sectional that Mj wanted was just a little ambitious.  We have room along the wall  to do it but we want it to extend from the wall and face where the TV is going to go and 12' extends too far into the walkway.  So, after stopping at a store to check out appliances we headed back to the furniture store to make an adjustment on our sectional order.  Less couch equals less money so we are actually spending a little less then we planned which is always fine by me.

We headed up to meet my mom at Paradise Grill for brunch.  The weather was not as warm and sunny as I had hoped but we did OK sitting outside.  Mj bought mom flowers and I gave her the Spa gift certificate that my sister and I went in on together.  She gets to pamper herself at the spa and she so deserves it.  It was a 3 course meal.  We each had a drink of our choosing, a starter, an entree and a dessert.  We were all stuffed by the end but the dessert was part of the package otherwise I would have never eaten it and who can resist Chocolate Molten Lava Cake? I never seem to be able to.  It's the same dessert I wanted demanded when we came here for my B Day a month ago.

All three of us chose it and it was DElicious.  I couldn't help but notice the way the fudge just oozed out so perfectly after I took my first bite.  We were all stuffed by the end of the meal and no one was hungry again for the rest of the day!  My mom really enjoyed it and was so appreciative that I picked out a nice spot.  I wish I could do so much more for my mom.  She is so kind, generous and just overall amazing.  We have always been close and I am so lucky to have her.

My mom showed me the three dresses she picked out for my wedding.  The black one was so cute but it's a July wedding so it won't work.  She's going to keep it anyways because it is so cute.  There was a maroon one in typical mother of the bride style with a little jacket to go with it.  I felt the color would compliment Pink nicely and it was OK but it had nothing on the Pink strapless one.  First of all it's a lovely pastel Pink.  Second of all it is stylish and hip and my mom is going to look just gorgeous in it.  She had a few reservations.  "Yes mom, I know you are fifty but you look great and can so pull this off."  And she will. 

Mom and I went and got pedicures after brunch.  It's been a ridiculously long time since I had a pedicure and it felt nice.  Unfortunately due to the gloomy weather I am still wearing closed toed shoes today but at least I know I have pretty toes under there.  We stopped at my aunt's house to say hi on the way back to the house and before we knew it it was about time to go home.  I finished up the laundry.  Yes, I still bring laundry to mom's house from time to time because she doesn't require $2.25 in hard to round up quarters like our ridiculous laundry room does.  I collapsed into bed around 10:30 pm.

Sunday was also my big sister's B day.  Poor thing is alone and in the middle of a very difficult pregnancy.  Her hubby is actually out here on the West Coast for training.  I wished her a Happy B Day and sent her some Mac items she wanted.  Yes, I'm about broke.  I have Mj's B day, Mom's day and Big Sis B day all within one week of each other.  Oh, and car registration too.  It's so worth it though when I find just the right thing and can make them happy.

Meet The Parents

Delaware is a place I never in a million years ever would have thought I would visit. Mj is actually the only person I've ever met in my life from there. It's not as cold as I thought it would be. We missed the storms thank goodness but there are still various piles of shoveled snow on the sides of the road.I enjoyed our trip but it's so good to be back home. We stayed the first three nights at Dover Air Force base lodging for only $30 per night. It even has free Wi Fi. Can't beat that. The room are pretty nice too!!

It reminds me a lot of Jacksonville, NC where my older sister currently lives. They are virtually interchangeable which perhaps could be said of many small towns in the South and the East Coast. You have your Super Walmart, Restaurants, fast food joints, and a small downtown area. It's flat and there are trees on either side of the highway that really isn't a freeway. There is lots of greenery and the most adorable little doll house like homes made of brick and aluminum siding. They have porches, sun rooms, and basements. No stucco to be found anywhere. All of the businesses look like charming brick houses. They even have Amish people in Delaware. The girls wear loose gray dresses, black sweaters, black boots, and white bonnets. It was freezing out and these two young girls were wearing that and riding a horse and buggy. I couldn't believe my eyes. The brick downtown jailhouse is more charming than any jailhouse I've ever seen before.

Definitely not a Super Max Prison

Amish Buggy. I can't believe people still live this way!

I met Mj's mom and dad and a bunch of his other relatives. It was really nice to have the opportunity to meet before the wedding. Everyone was really nice and welcoming. After we left Dover where most of his family lives we drove down to Virginia to meet mom. We stopped at a place called Cracker Barrel for breakfast which has the best pancakes I have ever tasted before. Brown and crispy at the edges unlike most restaurant pancakes which are pale and flavorless. The traffic was horrible so it took us about 7 hours but his mom had dinner ready for us when we got there and we had a good time. We spent the night there before heading out the next day to Washington D.C.

I have never been there before and I would definitely like to go back when it's not so darn cold. It was about 32 degrees. I was doing OK the whole trip because my exposure to the arctic conditions came in short spurts but I found myself outside for about an hour straight as we walked around DC and I thought I was getting frostbite. Seriously. My face was numb. My left hand was hurting and my lips were frozen. We checked out two museums at the Smithsonian.

Natural History Museum

We also got to see the huge White House Christmas tree. For some silly reason I thought we were going to be able to walk up to the White House but that was not the case. Security reasons and all I suppose, considering it is the president's house. We were able to see it from behind wire bars and trees. We had nothing to eat the whole day except a shared street vendor hot dog which was absolutely delicious so we took the subway back to our car and went to dinner. One of Mj's friends met us there. My hands literally had pins and needles as the blood began circulating back into them. We stayed the last night at the Hyatt that cost more then our three nights at Dover AFB and was extremely nice although we didn't really get to enjoy it much. We went to bed early to get ready for our 4:30am wake up call so that we could make our 6:45 am flight.

The Garden Room view from our Hotel Room. That's Mj walking towards the check out counter.

At the airport I stood under falling snow. So what right? But as a born and raised Cali girl that is something I have never actually done before. I've seen it for the first time in College and been in Atlanta when it had snowed but that is the extent of it. I thought it would be wet coming down but it's so light and fluffy!!

The flight out here wasn't so bad. Mj and I had the row to ourselves and we kept fairly occupied with reading and the in flight movie. The way home was entirely another story. We sat on the runway for about 2 hours while they de iced the plane. I was in and out of sleep the whole time so I don't really remember. Then our flight from Baltimore to LA was expected to take 5 hours and 11 minutes!! Towards the end of the flight it was so hot I had to take my shirt off and my butt was killing me. Due to the delay we missed our connecting flight and got home a later then expected. We were exhausted. All we wanted to do was get home and take a nap so we could rest up before our NYE dinner.

I always have thought that a couple's ability to travel together is a reflection of the kind of relationship they have. The ex husband and I traveled horribly together. It was stressful and worrisome to the point where it overshadowed excitement over the trip itself and it certainly was a reflection of how bad our relationship was. Things could not be more different with Mj and I. Things did go wrong on our trip here and there but as long as we were together and just went with the flow it was fine.

It is so good to be home. Did I already say that?

I am Thankful

I may not always have everything I want but I certainly have the things that I need and this is what I am thankful for:

• My wonderful friends and family.
• My fiance is home, and just in time for the holidays.
• I have a stable job with benefits, especially at a time when so many don't.
• I am healthy.
• I have some great things to look forward to next year.

I have been so extremely stressed out lately and it's so easy to loose sight of what is important at times like that. Now that Mj is here I am feeling better already. When I am alone I tend to over think everything and for me that is not such a good thing.

It was not only Thanksgiving but our 1 year anniversary. One year ago today we decided to spend the rest of our lives together. He got me the most beautiful diamond earrings and a really sweet card. I told him he had a $50 limit but did he listen? Nope!! We haven't really been doing a whole lot but have been just enjoying spending time together. I have a super special night on the town planned for Saturday that he knows absolutely nothing about. It'll be a nice surprise and my gift to him for just being such a great guy and to celebrate his homecoming.

We spent thanksgiving at my parent's house which is just a 45 minute drive away. We walked in the door just as my dad was opening it and were greeted by my mom shortly thereafter. She had a bunch of pre dinner snacks nicely displayed on a side table. We were starving of course so we started snacking and watching football while my mom finished up dinner. My aunt and uncle came over and it was time to dig in. I got a little bit of everything I wanted and didn't pay too much attention to every bite which was nice. I just enjoyed it. After I helped my mom clean up the kitchen we watched a movie with my parents. They were snuggled up together on the recliner while Mj and I snuggled up on the couch. My parents just celebrated their 36 year anniversary themselves and I hope that Mj and I are still as in love as they 3 decades from now.

It was a nice yet simple and relaxing thanksgiving. I really just wanted us all to enjoy the day and each other. I am very thankful because that's exactly what we did.

We Are Family

I load my bags into the back seat of my car and get in. I honk once like I always do as I make my U turn. They watch from the doorway. Two dark silhouettes outlined by the bright lights coming from inside the house. They wave and then close the door against the dark chilly night. There is a lump in my throat but it isn’t caused by sadness. I round the corner as I have done so many times before and the shadow of my childhood home rushes by me on the left and disappears behind me into the darkness. I set off on my drive home and quietly reflect on just how lucky I am. Those two people waving at me from the doorway are my parents and I have never once had reason to question their love for me or mine for them. It’s always been that way and the notion that I am very fortunate to have that is not lost on me. My two sisters are pretty great too. One is a creative fashionista going to College in the North and the other my beautiful and kind big sis who has re located to the South. I grew up with my big sister and her moving out of state has not shaken our closeness one bit. I take delight in seeing the poised and responsible young woman that my little sister has become. The painfully shy little gymnast flipping around the house is all grown up. I can’t wait to see what amazing things she is going to accomplish in her life. We are so very different and yet our parents girls and therefore the same. No matter how much space and time comes between us we will always have that sisterly bond.


My parents don’t live too far and I try to make sure to go up there regularly to visit. I am the only one of their girls who still can. My mom and I spend time together as any two best friends might. There was happy hour and the movies Saturday, shopping on Sunday, and plenty of just hanging out and talking in between. I couldn't ask for a better mother or friend. I am not sure why it never occurred to me before to ask but just before I left on Sunday night I wanted my parents to tell me the story of how they met. I could tell my dad was trying to fight the smile tugging at the corners of his mouth as he re counted the story of meeting my mom at a club in Detroit. His gruff exterior melts away as they take me along with them down memory lane. I can see how much they love each other in their exchanged glances as they smile at each other and chime in with their version of the events as they unfolded over 35 years ago. I try to picture my dad as the cool "older man." The handsome fit military man my mom describes him as and my mom as a young mother barely 20 years old. I should be so lucky to have so many years of marriage and shared experiences with my husband. There are so many secrets and history that I could never begin to understand that has kept their bond strong through the ups and downs of life and marriage. I know it hasn't been easy. My dad has not always been the easiest man to love. He is his own person. With time comes acceptance and understanding. His heart has always been in the right place and we love him as he is. As they speak of their early days my memory is jogged as fragmented and vague images of my childhood dart in and out of my mind so fast that they never fully materialize. A huge gold Oldsmobile with vinyl quilted seats, long cramped family road trips all the way to Michigan. A faded red door with peeling paint from a long ago house we used to live in. Just bits and pieces here and there but enough for me to know that I had a good childhood. I wish I could remember more. They were so very young when they started this family. I am grateful for all of the years of work and love that went into making a home for my sister’s and me.

My family is imperfect as all families and people are but we love each other and want the best for each other. That is what family is all about. There are people all over the world who were beaten, neglected, forgotten or otherwise unloved by the people that you most expect to love you unconditionally and I feel lucky that I haven’t ever had to experience that kind of pain. My parents have watched me grow over the years from a girl scout in pigtails with missing front teeth into the woman I am today. I’d like to think that I have made them proud. My parents and my sisters have always been there for me and I am comforted by the certainty that no matter what, they always will be. Just as I will always be there for them.