Queen for a Date

About once or twice a year we end up renting a hotel room and having a mini getaway downtown. In year's past we've done it for a holiday party, a dinner cruise, Halloween, or a celebration with friends. We don't live that far. We can and do use Uber, but sometimes it's fun to have the option of walking "home" and getting to live that downtown lifestyle for a night when we're planning to be out really late. Downtown San Diego is such a fun place to be, so why not? We always have a great time.

9 Funny First Date Dont's

Anyone else watching Married at First Sight?  If you aren't don't start.  It's addicting.  If you are, then you know it is a train wreck you can't look away from and that season four  appears to be the biggest disaster of them yet so far.  Each season there are three couples and out of the nine couples who have gone through the entire process only two actually worked out.  Two couples from season one are still married.  This was before all the people came out of the wood works trying to get paid for being on a hit TV show.  I think that is only one part of why these marriages aren't working.  The other part is that meeting someone sight unseen, marrying them, honeymooning, and moving in together in six weeks is just slightly insane!  Throw in cameras and "relationship experts" that could be matching for ratings and it's no wonder that most of the relationships crash and burn.

People are complicated.  So, so very complex.  I still think it's kind of a miracle that you can even find one person on this earth that you want to spend the rest of your life and with whom you can maintain a healthy happy relationship.  There are so many big things and so many little things to consider.  Some people can't even make it past one date and that is the main topic of this post.

I am obsessed with this morning radio segment called Second Try or is it Good-Bye that tries to get second dates for people, or at the very least find out why they got ghosted.  Most of the callers do not get that second date.  It seems that once people have made up their mind that they don't want to date someone it's hard to change it. 

This is the latest list of first date dont's.  The first set is here.  It's pretty funny.

1.  Don't post every single detail of your magical date and prince charming like kiss on Facebook.  Your date deserves not to have everything that happened (even if it was really good) outlined across social media.  YES, she got a second date with the agreement that she would be more discreet in the future.

2.  Don't tell the waitress it's her birthday inviting staff to rush the table and sing Happy Birthday when it's not her birthday.  She may or may not be comfortable with that type of charade and you don't know her well enough to know either way.  He realized that might be a bit uncomfortable for someone, and agreed not to do it again.  YES, to a second date.

3.  Don't invite someone over if your DVR is 90% full, your sheets are in a twisted lump because you didn't make the bed, and the sink is full of dirty dishes. This is a reflection of who you are as a person and 'aint nobody got time for that.  NO second date. 

4.  Don't invite a date in for some sexy time when there are stuffed animals covering your entire bed.  So many that you have to spoil the mood transferring them to another location to make room so they can stare at you with their beady stuffed animal eyes while you get hot and heavy.  It turns out some women find men with that many stuffed animals on display creepy. NO second date.

5.  Don't ambush him with "meet the parents" on your very first date.  This makes him feel set up and like he's being tested before he's even had a chance to date you.  She explained that it is a spot they frequent regularly.  She chose it so she would feel comfortable, not because she expected her parents would show up, and she would have felt rude not inviting them to join the date.  YES, second date accepted.

6.  Don't interrupt a romantic stroll on the beach to get your entire face painted like a tiger by a street artist.  It's just kind of weird when you are just getting to know someone, and now your date has to be seen with a half man half tiger.  NO second date.

7.  Don't wax poetic about your future yellow couch, in your future living room when you have literally just met.  It's a little intense.  What if he doesn't like yellow?  NO second date.

8.  Don't be rude to your waiter.  Furthermore, when you are called out on it don't admit that you have no problem with "putting someone in their place" when you feel it is appropriate.  This guy was clearly a major jerk.  Her date said the waiter was flirting and interjecting himself into their conversation and for those crimes he absolutely deserved to be treated like an intruder and did not deserve a tip.  NO second date.

9.  Don't choose a burger joint for your first date, order a salad and pair it with two jars of baby food stashed in your purse.  I totally get being health conscious.  I ordered a salad on our first date, but I do think the baby food is a bit much for a first date.  In her defense, she explained that baby food has less preservatives and she simply likes to maintain a fit lifestyle.  The guy was a real piece of work though because he kept making really rude jokes about how when you are on a diet you wouldn't eat dog food so why baby food and kept running his mouth, so that they couldn't even have a mature conversation about it.  She's better off without him anyway.  NO second date.

Good thing those people weren't on a weird reality show called married at first date.  Most of the offenses aren't that bad and are probably just things that shouldn't happen when people are forming first impressions and trying to decide if they like each other or not.  I dismissed people for far less when I was dating, and lucky for me I didn't do anything on our first date that sent MJ running for the hills. 

 
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Make Me an Artist and Let Me Drink Wine

I don't have an artistic bone in my body.  I can't sing.  I can't dance, unless you count the adult ballet classes I used to take.  Actually, I was kind of good.  I can't draw, and I'm not crafty.  I can't do anything Pinterest worthy.  Maybe I can write, but that's about it, so when MJ organized a painting class for date night at Pinot's Palette in Liberty Station I was pretty sure it would be a total fail.

Maybe it's paint my numbers.  It has to be, because when I saw what we were supposed to be painting that night I just knew there wasn't any other way it was possible to get people who haven't held a paint brush since middle school art class to replicate a beautiful painting.  Painting the walls in your house doesn't count.  There was no overlay, nothing to trace.  We showed up to rows of blank white canvas and I figured that whatever I did would look like kindergarten finger painting.   My fate was sealed.  There was nothing else to do but drown my sorrows in a glass of wine...or two.

I was too busy drinking and nibbling off of the fancy meat and cheese platter MJ prepared to pay too much attention at first, but eventually I hit my stride.  It went a little something like this.  Sip wine.  Brush paint onto canvas.  Sip wine.  Dip paint brush in water.  Blot.  Brush strokes on canvas.  Sip wine.  Mix black and white paint.  Flip the canvas upside down.  Sip wine.  Add a little bit of white paint to the blue paint.  Eat cheese.  Brush strokes.  Blend.  Sip wine.  Sip wine.  It was so much fun! 

Mine on the left, the one I was copying on the right.  I added more leaves after MJ pointed out my bare branches

The trees were the scariest part, because they would be the center piece of the whole thing.  After adding the first set, MJ's canvas looked really good.  Mine was still looking pretty hopeless, so I drank more wine and persevered.  The music was pumping.  Nothing classical for us budding Picasso's.  It was all Biggie Smalls and Justin Bieber...you know, for inspiration.  By the time we got to dotting on the leaves I was having a lot of fun, and really excited to that it wasn't going to be a hot mess.  All it took was two hours, wine, and step by step instructions to make me feel like a legit artist. You don't have to have any talent whatsoever.  They tell you exactly what to do, you do it, and you will have a decent painting.  It's brilliant!  I'm actually pretty proud of my painting, and I still can't believe I did it.

Now.  What to do with our masterpieces?  They are not allowed in MJ's room, because the contemporary Neo-Classic aesthetic clashes with the Buffalo Bills motif, but I must find a home for them somewhere in our house.

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16 First Date Don'ts

I meant to post this a few weeks ago, but I went off on this tangent about how I fell in love with MJ at Souplantation on our 3rd date, and it turned into that post instead.  Then, we went to Temecula Wine Country, and I blogged about that, then work got busy and I was too tired to even read blogs let alone write a post, then the longer you go without blogging the easier it is to...not blog.

Anyway.

I listen to this radio segment called Second Try or is it Good-Bye? on Channel 94.1 that usually comes on during my commute to work.  I don't even get mad about traffic those days because it means I won't miss the conclusion.  If I hear the first part I have to know what happens! The basic idea is that people who have been jilted after a first date call in to see if the radio station can find out why, and/or try to get them a second date.  When it first started, I couldn't believe they were going to embarrass people like that on the radio.  So cringe worthy! So awkward!  I mean, how sad for a person to hear why another person doesn't like them and never wants to see them again blasted over the radio.  I certainly wouldn't have the guts to call in for that information and be publicly rejected.  It's still very awkward when people get all defensive or if it turns into an argument, but I've gotten used to it and now I just  look forward to the juicy details.

I am very fascinated by relationships in general, which is why it's no surprise that I love Married at First Sight.  Never mind how it's gone off the deep end.   I find it so interesting to see how relationships are as unique as the individuals themselves and how each person introduces personality and viewpoints that have such a huge impact on whether the relationship works, or doesn't even start.  First impressions are huge and some things are deal breakers.  The track record is not good.  Most people don't get second dates.

And here you have it, 16 things not to do on a first date as discovered by single people of San Diego.  Single or married, it's a fun read.

1.  Don't talk excessively, non-stop and exclusively about Music.  This probably goes for anything.  It's okay to be passionate about it and excited that you share something in common, but if she has no clue who you are because you made her listen to song after song on your phone and sang a few of them at the top of your lungs you are probably overdoing it. YES

2.  Don't hate excessively on the restaurant that your date chooses.  You never know if it is owned by one of her family members.  Even if it isn't there is no need to make your date feel bad with a running commentary of everything you hate about it. NO

3.  Don't hate excessively on children, even if you are out at night in an adult atmosphere.  I get it.  As a single and ready to mingle kind of person, riding an elevator in your skin tight party dress with a few toddlers is probably not your cup of tea.  A comment is no big deal, but refrain from complaining and expressing how insulted you are over it the entire night.   Kids are part of the world and your date may be part of a gigantic Italian family with kids everywhere, and very accepting of them even if you aren't. NO

4.  Don't order any fun foods that might might get attention at restaurants.  Stay away from sizzling fajitas or big ass Margaritas the size of your head or else your date may think that you are an attention monger just like his ex girlfriend. NO

5.  Don't wear too much over the top make up when he's already seen you at the gym looking perfect as ever au natural.  If you show up with fake lashes, show girl make-up, tons of jewelry, and a short tight dress he might feel like he's dating an entirely different girl than the one he asked out. YES

6.  Don't make too much money and choose a restaurant for the first date that is way out of his price range.  If he's a barista, and you are a lawyer it is not going to work.  He's tried it before and he knows that at some point your friends and family will be talking crap behind his back and he doesn't want to go through that again. NO

7.  Don't spit on the ground excessively.  I think a gal can understand if you are sick with a cold or just happen to have a bit of phlegm that can't wait, but do not spit consistently throughout the date.  It's really a turn off. NO

8.  Don't stalk your date on every form of social media and then talk to him about things that you would only know if you had done that.  It might make a cute story after  you've  been together for a while, but on your first date.  Creepy.  When you express concern over this don't be surprised if he says, "Well, good luck dating people who don't like you." NO

9.  Don't insist that your dog is basically the same thing as a child. Don't claim that you understand her struggle as a single mom because you are single and  you have a dog.  If she insists that it's actually different, don't dig in your heels and say that it's the same exact thing, because you also have to get a babysitter when you go out of town or on a date. NO

10.  Don't talk about all the hot guys you've dated. Name dropping is also not necessary.  You might think it is making you appear more desirable and amazing, but it gives the impression that you are superficial, and it makes him feel insecure and like he couldn't possibly measure up to the hunks that have kissed your lips. NO
 
11.  Don't invite your ex boyfriend to join you while you are on your first date with another guy, if you happen to see him sitting alone at the bar. NO

12.  Don't assume that just because you blew up the bathroom with your unexpected and totally inconvenient post dinner poops after she invited you into her tiny apartment for a drink that she never wants to talk to you again.  She and her roommate were not laughing at you, and don't  find you the most disgusting person on earth.  They actually had no idea that it even happened.  YES

13.  Don't drop your phone in the toilet, switch to a temporary flip phone, and lose her number. YES

14.  Don't be "just a bartender" when your date is only interested in men with an established career or actively pursuing an established career.  You might find out later, that he is actually in grad school and change your mind when he calls into a radio station to find out why you didn't want a second date, but by then it's too late because he's already extremely offended by your attitude.  NO

15.  Don't spend half the date talking on the phone to your twelve year old daughter who is perfectly capable and self sufficient.  He may think that you don't have room in your life for a man right now.   YES

16.  Don't deny being a smoker when you pick him up in your car that reeks of cigarette smoke.  All the mints in the world won't hide the taste of tobacco when he goes in for a good-night kiss.  Smoking can be a deal breaker and even though you say you would be willing to quit for the right person, you've already shown yourself to be a liar.  NO

Only 5 out of 16 got second dates proving once again that first impressions really are everything.  Make it count. 
  

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I Fell in Love With My Husband at Souplantation

I've been dating my husband for eight years.  I love it.  I don't have to worry about not liking him and figuring out a way to get him to stop calling me. I don't have to worry about doing something stupid and being embarrassed or whether or not he likes me.   I don't have to wonder if we will kiss at the end of the night, or if I should go to bed with him.  The best thing about dating your own husband is that it's a sure thing.  You know exactly what you are getting, yet sometimes he surprises you and you already know the date is going to be great just because you are with him.  Dating for singles?  Not so much.  I look back on my dating days with a mixture of fondness and aversion. Yes, it was fun sometimes.  The free dinners, the flirtation, the anticipation; but it was also exhausting and annoying.  I was a late bloomer and spent a ridiculously long time in my very first relationship.  I was only part of the dating world for exactly three years of my life.  It was plenty.

Date #4 and our first picture together:  April 12, 2008

Back in the old days before Tinder and Snap Chat, when online dating was still a brave new frontier I met my husband the old fashioned way.  A blind date.  It was raining that night.  I waited under an overhang of the convention center, until I saw his silver SUV pull up to the Marriott hotel and made a mad dash to his car huddled under my umbrella so as not to ruin my professionally done hair and airbrush make-up.  I had just finished a modeling gig so the first time he laid eyes on me, I was the hottest version of myself.

I opened the door and jumped in.  "Hello."  And I found myself sitting next to a man with a boat load of crap in the back of his SUV who would later become my husband.  He had just returned to California after three months in Arizona.  We made a quick decision to go to T.G.I. Friday's downtown because it was close.  We both ordered dinner salads.  We laughed.  He checked out my butt when I got up to go to the bathroom.  I didn't find that out until later, but I was hoping because I knew I looked good that night, and who doesn't want to be admired?  After the check came, he dropped me off where I'd parked my car.

They say first impressions are everything and I agree.   The one and done thing was not new to me.  There were guys I would go on one dinner date with and know that I didn't want to ever see them again.  It didn't even have to be anything major. If I wasn't as attracted to him in person as I was to his online profile, or if he was geographically undesirable, there was a good chance it wasn't going to work.  If the conversation was forced, or I just wasn't that interested for whatever reasons, it probably wasn't going to work.  I was quick to judge, but I had a heart.  I felt guilty having him treat me a second time for no reason.  I was living alone, and working part-time while modeling part time.  I didn't have the desire to spend time and money or burn through gas for just anyone.  It just wasn't that serious.  If I wasn't feeling it, your calls would be ignored, and there would not be a second date.

I wasn't so sure about a second date with MJ, but it wasn't a hard no.  I also wasn't that sure about an all day date, but he called and I said yes.  He planned everything.  There was go cart racing, pizza eating, kite flying and an almost movie.  We held hands briefly in Walmart.  It was great.  He was great, but it was a long day, and the homebody in me was ready to go home.  I liked him, but I didn't know if I liked him, liked him.  I wasn't ready to commit to three more hours, or a third date.  We sat in the parking lot of the movie theater and talked for an hour instead, and then he took me home.  It was the sweetest, and funnest date I'd ever been on, and yet still, I wasn't sold.

I distinctly remember telling my parents that I didn't feel like going on that third date.

It was my Birthday, and they had taken me to Outback Steakhouse for dinner.  "I don't know mom.  I think I just want to go home after work.  It will be such a long day."

He was cute; and I genuinely laughed when I was with him like I had not done with anyone else, but I was sort of just dating to date.  I really didn't care all that much about having a boyfriend.  I'd been through a lot, was still going through a lot, and felt like damaged goods; better off alone.  It was a Wednesday.  April 2nd to be exact.  I stopped at Walmart to get some grocery shopping done, because there was time to kill between work and our thired date which was to be a basketball game and dinner.  Recreational Basketball; and he was playing.  I sat in the bleachers and watched him run up and down the court with a bunch of other guys in their twenties and thirties.  I don't remember if they won or lost.  I wonder if he does?  Afterwards we went straight to Souplantation, because it was close.  It was actually a step down from T.G.I. Friday if anything.  Him in his basketball gear, and me in whatever it was I wore to work that day, minus the glamour shot look.

Precisely nine days after Souplantation I was in my car on a Friday night driving 1 1/2 hours and almost 100 miles to his house.  I actually wasn't supposed to go up there until the next day, but I'd packed a bag before meeting up with my girlfriends secretly hoping that when I called he would say yes.  Little did I know that his apartment was a mess and the second he hung up with me, he scrambled around his apartment in a mad dash to clean up.

Date #384 something...I lost count (2016)

Needless to say, that third date went exceedingly well, and to this day I can't really explain why.  It was just Souplantation.  There are so many things that can go wrong on those first few dates, but also so much that can go right. He could have been turned off my my heavy make-up  on the first date, or disappointed by my lack thereof on the second.  I could have thought it weird that he ordered a salad, or offended that he would invite me to Souplantation in his sweaty gym clothes.  I could have bailed on that third date because I was tired.  I never called him during those early days.  He could have sensed my reluctance and backed off.  I could have listened to that voice in my head telling me I didn't deserve a man so kind.  He could have given up when I tried to run.  I could have sent him to the place where most men who dated me at that time ended up.  Away.  But I didn't.  Because I fell in love with him at Souplantation, and thank goodness because I would have missed out on so much.  I didn't know it was happening at the time, but we talked and talked in between helpings from the buffet, and something shifted.  Not only did I want to see this guy again.  I needed to.

The fourth date was a romantic gondola ride through the canals of Long Beach while we sipped wine and nibbled from an antipasto platter.  It was BYOB, and we searched and searched for a liquor store to buy the wine.  He carried me on his back for a few blocks when my feet got tired, and we laughed in relief when we made it to the boat on time.  It was our fanciest date yet, but from the beginning none of that mattered.  I didn't care if date night was eating chicken and rice bowls with beer and watching movies at home or making homemade Mexican pizza from one of his recipe books.  I didn't care how much money I spent driving to Orange County every weekend.  I had an SUV.  I couldn't afford it, but I did it anyway.  I didn't care how early I had to get up on Monday morning to get to work, if it meant I could stay an extra night.  It didn't bother me anymore that he was four years younger than me.  I was no longer dating just to date.  This man had stolen my heart, and there was nothing I could do about it.

He was hooked on day one (baby, you know its true).  It took me eighteen days from blind date to smitten, and my only regret is that instead of just sitting back and enjoying the ride, I tried to push him away.  We've traveled Europe, Hawaii times three, dined on rooftops, danced on cruise ships, and eaten $100 steaks, but I fell in love with him at Souplantation, and it doesn't get any better than that.

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Fine Dining is Fun and Funny

Over the weekend MJ took me on a surprise date.  That morning he said we're going somewhere nice and we're leaving at 4:45pm.  I waited promptly until 4:25pm to rush around and get ready.  I'm really low maintenance like that.  We'd spent most of the day doing fun things like cleaning the windows (him) and vacuuming floors (me).  The weather was gorgeous though and demanding to be enjoyed so I was glad to get out of the house.

I knew something was up when he washed a load of dress shirts and reached for his dress shoes instead of flip flops or chucks.  He is not a dressing up guy and rarely does it even if I beg so I was really wondering where we were going that would cause him to go to such lengths.  When we showed up at Bertrand at Mr. A's it all made sense.  They have a dress code.  Button ups required and no open toed shoes are ever permitted so he really had no choice in the matter.  It's kind of an interesting set up because it's on the top floor of an office building.  You don't feel like you are going to a restaurant until the elevator doors open at the top. 

They don't call it fine dining for nothing.  From the minute you walk in they treat you like kind of a big deal.  We were greeted politely and led to our table by a man in a suite and tie who held the door open for us, pulled out my chair and laid the cloth napkin in my lap.  Being the country bumpkin that I am I didn't realize what he was doing until he said, "For your lap."   Once seated our waitress rattled off a long list of specials half of which I could not remember once she walked away.  I was impressed that she can even say half the words most of which I had no idea what they were let alone recite it all from memory.  She brought us our wine selection and poured just a little bit in MJ's glass before patiently stepping back and waiting for him to taste it and give his approval.  I'm curious to know if you are really allowed to say no.  Can you say you don't like it and would like to try a different bottle.  Then, what if you don't like that one?  Is it just a formality to pretend you have a choice when in reality all bottles will end up on your tab anyway? I am happy with $2 wine from Walmart so there is no chance I'll ever reject a $30 something bottle of wine.  I don't know how these things work.    

At a nice restaurant you are the star and servers stalk you, but in a good way.  They are most definitely watching you even if you can't see them doing it.  You don't even get a chance to pour your second glass of wine before they are doing it for you and there is no begging for more bread.  It just shows up.  One person seated us, another took our order, another brought us our entree's and yet another refilled our water glasses never letting it go below half.  They are an army ready to leap into service so that the minute you look like you might need something they are right there.  The only way to make them stop is to stop eating or drinking but you won't do that since that's what you came for.  They were so attentive that I don't even feel bad when our waitress offered to take our picture.  Twice, because the sun was causing too much back light the first time.  You don't have to give up your first born to get a dessert menu or the check either.  They don't rush you, and yet when you are ready to wrap it up it's right there and the service is definitely reflected in the cost of your steak. 

The food was good too.  It better be right?  I got filet Mignon and MJ went for half filet and half short rib.  Our dessert was like a giant Twix bar but better.  Sitting outside was AMAZING.  The weather was perfect for it and I actually felt kind of bad for the people sitting inside because they were really missing out on the weather and the view because they don't put pull up the sunshades on the giant wall of windows inside until after the sun sets.

Fine dining is funny.  There is always that awkward moment where the amount of times your water glass has been refilled borders on embarrassing and someone is picking up the garnish that fell off your entree plate and scraping your crumbs off the table with their fingers where you kind of feel weird that someone is serving you so astutely.  It's also fun though because it's nice to be catered to and get the star treatment every now and then.  I'm just a little bit of a restaurant snob.  My Applebee's days are done.  I need some ambiance when I dine out.  The VIP five star treatment is not a necessity but it sure is nice every now and then.  Thanks to the husband for such a sweet date. Neither one of us had ever been there before and now I want to go back sometime to experience it at night. 

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Wicked Good Date and a Wicked Bad One

When we were in New York we were interested in seeing Wicked but saw Kinky Boots instead so when Wicked came to town for eight weeks we were all over it.  I thought tickets were expensive just because it was New York but unfortunately I think theater in general is expensive.  We got really good seats though and it was a really good show.  I grew up knowing about Dorothy and Toto with their gang of friends off to see the wizard but new nothing about who got smashed under the house, the background of the Tin Man, Scarecrow, the Cowardly Lion and how Glenda and the Wicked Witch of the West came to be.  Turns out the wicked witch was not wicked at all; just misunderstood.

It was my first date with that cute little Louis that required documentation.  There is a neat story behind it too that I will share later.

We planned it so we could go to the play and then have dinner at Fleming's downtown.  I have no sense of direction but when MJ said it was on the opposite side so we should drive I looked it up.  I tend to believe there isn't any place I can't walk to and I didn't want to give up the parking we had already paid for.  It was only .7 miles.  We walked a million miles in New York and I was wearing my comfy flat knee high boots.  Definitely walkable, and then we got to stop for cheap drinks along the way.  I got this $40 off coupon from my AmEx card which may or may not even cover an entree depending on what you get, but a discount is a discount.  I'd never been and it sounded like a great idea to add it onto our date.  After having eaten so much chicken over the last year I crave juicy steak's more then I ever have before.  I got the filet and it did not disappoint.  MJ got a filet with crab and caviar on top.  Eww.  The steaks were juicy and full of flavor, the garlic flavor of the mashed potatoes was perfect and the bread was hot and crusty.  Fine (very expensive) dining is kind of overrated in my book.  I don't need a $40 steak but if I get one it better be good; And it was.   Forgive me for a second while I swoon over my husband.  I didn't get a picture of him so you will have to believe me when I say he looked so cute!  He was freshly shaved which I love because it brings out his baby face.  He refused to wear slacks or dress shoes but he wore a nice button up.  It was a wicked good date.

How does he manage to look cute at a time like this?  Cute but gross!! And hey, they won  the championship so he'd say it was worth it.

Sunday's date however was terrible.  It was very poorly planned or should I say not planned at all and the ambiance was terrible.  I met my grungy blood spattered husband at the emergency room where he promptly devoured a foot long subway sandwich plus cookie while we waited for hours in butt numbing chairs amongst a crowd of injured and/or potentially contagious people.  Fun, I tell ya.  I got the dreaded text message that Mr. Accident Prone had done it again and I needed to find an urgent care.  He got hurt in his last (of three) flag football games and when you get hurt after 5pm on the weekends the only option is the ER.  He hadn't eaten all day and they told him it was a 90 minute wait so I plucked my pajama clad body off the couch, threw on some sweats and made a Subway stop before meeting him there.  He got there at 6:30pm, I got there at 7:30pm, he got called back at 9:45pm and we were out of there around 10:45pm with seven stitches in his head.  He's quite the trooper.  He actually went back into the game after he busted his head, didn't even flinch when the needle went in and was up by 4:30am for work today.

It's going to be a long Monday.

It wasn't an ideal way to spend a Sunday evening but I wouldn't have had it any other way.  I would have felt like crap sitting at home while he starved alone for hours with a busted head.  Being married means that sometimes you just gotta step up to the plate and choose the inconvenient option.  When he thanked me and told me what a good wife I was it made the whole ordeal more then worth it. 

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Date Night with Dave Chappelle

Saturday was date night.  Mj bought tickets to see Dave Chappelle so we made a night of it.   I have restaurant.com credit BUT the restaurant we wanted to go to had a $10.00 for $25.00 offer if you just buy it so that's what I did.   Also, that way I get to "save" the credit for future use.  I like knowing I have things even if I don't use them.  It's all part of my hoarding addiction.  And because it's one of Discover's shopping partners I got 20% cash back on the purchase.  I know it's only $2.00 but it adds up.  Gosh I love deals.  I'm still excited about it.

We decided to try something different and go with an Indian restaurant. Gourmet India had really good food but sadly the service sucked.  I got Chicken Tikka.  Not very adventurous but oh so good.  Mj got Lamb Tikka and we got two orders of piping hot Naan bread which was delicious.  Our waitress came by and took our drink order after a bit of a wait but after that we had to ask her if we could order then ask whomever passed by for whatever else we needed.  It's not even a very big place so I'm not sure why providing us service was such an impossible task.

After that we went to a little shop for dessert.  I got Espresso flavored Gelato and Mj got a Chocolate and Strawberry Crepe.  There is so much energy downtown and I really enjoyed being out in it. 

The comedy show didn't start until 10:30pm.  That's when I'd normally be winding down a night out so it's a good thing we both got naps that day.  Even so I could feel my eyes wanting to shut it down half way through the show.  One of the oddest things about the show is that he smoked cigarettes through the whole thing.  He walked on stage cigarette in hand trailing a plume of smoke behind him and when one burned out he lit up another.  I was thinking that he either has a really bad addiction or he's trying to be cool but I'm going with addiction because I don't think anybody thinks smoking is cool anymore.  And it's really, really odd because there is no indoor smoking in California.  You can't smoke inside anywhere.  His show his rules; I guess.   He's not skinny anymore.  Apparently, he's gone out and gotten all buff and to show it off he performed in his gym clothes.  He had on a black sleeveless T Shirt emphasizing those bulging biceps and grey athletic pants pushed up to his knees.  I found myself wishing there were subtitles like I put on about 90% of the time when we watch movies at home.  I ended up missing a lot of jokes just because I couldn't quite catch what he was saying.  I think I've laughed harder at other comedy shows but he was funny and I did enjoy it. 

That night marks the first time I've ever worn boots and a dress in my life.  Ever.  While I realize it's pretty much a common every day occurrence for me it felt like I was taking a fashion risk.  It's also the first time I've worn that dress.  I've never really considered myself a "dress person" but I'm trying to be.  I got it about 2 years ago for $12.00 at Ross and it's been sitting in the closet with the tags on ever since.  I also have a really cute pair of peep toe red pumps I got a few years ago that probably still have the price sticker on the bottom.  And that's just the half of it.  Like I said, I'm a hoarder.

It was a great date night.

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Luxury Cinema Date Night

The cost of movie tickets has gone up so much over the years.  By the time you pay $12 per person to get in and spend over $20 on popcorn, drinks and candy it's turned into a very expensive night out.  When we go we usually buy snacks and drinks at Target before we go and smuggle it in.  So if you think that's bad imagine paying $19.50 for movie tickets.  On Saturday night we did just that.   There's a luxury movie theater called Cinepolis where you pay a lot more then the average movie ticket price but you also get a lot more.  We've been meaning to try it out for about 2 years and just finally got around to it.

You have to make advance reservations on line for an assigned seat.  The movie selection is also a little limited just because they only have 8 theater's.  When you walk in it looks more like a trendy restaurant than a movie theater.  There is a bar on the left and a room full of tables so you can enjoy a drink or snack before your movie.  We met a couple there for a quick drink before ours.  Instead of your average movie seat you get a giant leather recliner and they are set up in pairs.   There are about 7 pairs per row.  We walked to our seat, kicked off our shoes and pushed the button that reclines our seat.   Then the waiter came around and took our order.  Most of the food is fairly low maintenance which makes sense because you are essentially eating in the dark.  They have things like wraps, onion rings, paninis and Sushi.  There was Chocolate Molten Lava cake for dessert among other things.  They also have gourmet popcorn and typical movie candy.  The food prices were surprisingly reasonable.  We ordered mini corn dogs as an appetizer.  I splurged and got the Caesar salad.  Yes,  this is a splurge because I normally won't touch full fat dressing.  Mj got the Burger and fries.  There is a little table that slides over for you to eat your food.  We saw Django and it was really good.  Classic Quentin Tarantino touches but in a totally different setting then you would ever expect.  We both really liked it.

So was it worth $19.50?  Call me crazy and I know it's totally excessive but I actually say yes.  It's a novelty and you're paying for that along with the extra amenities.  The price is steep but it was absolutely the best movie watching experience ever!  Django is a long movie and my butt never got tired once.  It was so cozy being able to cuddle up comfortably with Mj.  You feel like you're at home but you're not.  Why not stay home then for free right?  Well, it was a fun and different date night for us to go out and do together.  It's not something we'll do every time or even every other time we go to the movies.  That would be ridiculous.  We're not rich.  It would just be an every so often kind of thing but we definitely plan on going back.

Wine Tasting and a Picnic

Friday I had the day off.  I spent the morning running errands then my big sister and nephew came down and we met some friends for lunch.  We stayed up late watching a movie and had a great time.  I love spending time with her. 

It was so cool to wake up Saturday morning after having such a great day off Friday and still have my whole weekend to look forward to.  Aren't three day weekends the best?  We live just a little over an hour away from wine country but I've never ever been.  For Christmas my mom got Mj and I a Living Social Deal for Wine Tasting at Danza Del Sol Winery so we finally made it up there.  I was so worried about the weather spoiling our outing.  It has been a little chilly and rainy lately but this day could not have been more perfect.  It was a balmy 81 degrees.  The winery grounds were really green and beautiful.  We got a 20 minute tour, six tastings and a bottle of wine of our choice to take home.  They had some really tasty sweet wines.  We also used our 10% off for the day to buy an extra one.  It was fun.  I managed to get a little tipsy off of my tastings so Mj had to drive us to our next stop. 

Turns out that the winery didn't have a grassy area for a picnic so we went to a nearby park called Lake Skinner.  It was so pretty and peaceful out there.   It's been a while since we had a picnic.  We do it pretty simple.  Just wine, cheese, crackers, Olive Bruschetta, Naan Bread, lunch meat and grapes.  We ate and enjoyed the scenery and then fell asleep.  I love a good afternoon nap and one at the park is even better.  I drifted off to sleep with the feel the warm breeze on my face and the sounds of birds and people laughing in the distance.  It was so soothing and relaxing.  We spent three hours there on that blanket under a tree just chillin'.

What a great weekend it was.  Too bad it goes by so fast.  Monday morning will be a rude awakening.

Dinner and a Casting

Last month one night before bed Mj handed me his i Phone and told me to check something out.  Fresh off the indignation of having Valentine's Day thrust upon him yet again he stumbled upon something called Steak & Knobber day.  If you have a curious mind and wanna google it go ahead; I dare you.   It's basically the little known male version of Valentine's Day except in typical male fashion the expectations are very specific.  It doesn't quite have the er, commercial potential of Valentine's Day so it won't ever be as popular as V Day but I guess I don't blame the guys for wanting "their" day with their little man spin on it since women seem to be the V Day focus.  He didn't ask me if I'd go along with it but I took it as a hint that he bothered to show it to me at all and since he indulges me on V Day I decided to return the favor.  

Mac & Cheese with Crumbled Bacon on top

Like Valentine's Day Steak & Knobber day fell on a not so date night friendly Tuesday so Friday night downtown would have to do.  I gave him five places to choose from and he chose the most expensive one of course.  Greystone The Steakhouse only made the list of options because I managed to turn some airline miles into a $25 restaurant gift card.  He ordered Steak with Crab on top and I ordered a side salad and a side of Macaroni and Cheese.  I have never ordered Mac & Cheese at a restaurant because next to Fettuccine Alfredo which is also on my do not order list I can't think of any other pasta that is more fat and calorie ridden.  I was craving it for some odd reason and they had it so I splurged.  It was so delicious.  It's comfort food after all so it totally eased the discomfort of paying $11 on for a glass of Wine.  Hold up.  Now that I think about it...how is it that my Mac & Cheese was just $1 more and my side salad was actually $1 less then wine? Oh well. 

After dinner we walked about a block to our casting.  I don't model anymore.  Castings and shoots are during the weekday and it was getting too hard to juggle them with work.  I technically do still have an agent and every now and then she'll send me a casting-which I usually can't make.  This time it was a print add for Microsoft.  They were looking for people between the ages of 25-45 and models were encouraged to bring their significant other.  How could I pass up a casting that was happening from 6-10pm down the street from a restaurant we were already planning to go to?  Well, this never happens so obviously I can't.  The timing was just too perfect and the fact that we could do it together was a bonus.  It was a typical casting.  Fill out your information sheet, wait your turn and smile for the camera.  This time they asked us to make a crazy face for the last shot.   Why?  I don't know but it's not even the weirdest thing I've ever been asked to do on a casting.  I thought it was so cute to see him standing there with his number and smiling for the camera.   Awww....his first casting.  It was at this really cool new Gelato Cafe/Bakery/Bar/Restaurant called Cremolose that I'd never even heard of before.  Of course we got some Gelato on the way out and ate it at the bar.

I already explained to him that since I referred him that makes me his manager so if he gets booked for the job I get a 10% cut.   As for the Knobber part of Steak & Knobber Day...well, I'll leave it to you to decide if I delivered on that one.

Groupon Date

I love saving money so I'm a major fan of Groupon (if you use this link to sign up I get $10 Groupon bucks if you buy one).  They have deals on so many things we want to do around town.  They even have Groupon Travel now.  We both downloaded the app to our i phones and it keeps them all organized so we can keep track of what we used, what we have and when they expire.  You can even redeem them from your phone without having to worry about printing them out.  By the time you get around to using them it almost feels like a free outing because it's already paid for.

He's concentrating

Mj has never been ice skating nor ever had any inclination to.  I've done it before but it's been a while.  Enter Groupon and off to Ice Town we go.   The first time I got on the ice I was really wobbly.  Once I got my bearings and after I tightened up my boots I did much better.  I'm no wall hugger.  Before long I was zooming around the ice rink.  I can go three times around to Mj's one.  I can't help but notice this because it's probably one of the rare moments that I can actually do something better then him.  It probably won't happen again any time soon so I savored the moment.  I'm loving the feel of the wind in my hair and the icy cold air against my face as I race around the rink.  And then it happened.  Toe Pick.  Anyone who has seen The Cutting Edge knows what that means.  One minute I'm sliding across the ice on my feet and the next I'm sliding across the ice on my stomach instead.  The rough edge on the front end of my blade caught the ice and tripped me up.  I literally caught air and hit the ice hard taking most of the weight on my right knee.  Usually when you fall your first instinct is to get up as fast as you can but I could not move.  I lay there on the cold ice like a broken rag doll until one of the instructors helps me up.  Then she hands me my camera which has fallen out of my pocket.  Covered in ice chips I gingerly cling to the wall until I make it around to an exit and sit down.  Too bad because I was just getting ready to practice my jumps and spins.  Not quite!  My knee hurt so bad but I didn't let that spoil my fun.  I rested and was back on the ice and skating circles around Mj again in no time.  I didn't skate as fast because I couldn't take another fall.  Mj said that with every move he basically felt like he was about to fall over but he got more confident as he went along.  He never went very fast but he stayed on his feet and didn't fall unlike me.

These suckers were like torture devices! My ankles were pretty sore

A delicious dinner

After that it was time for part two of our Groupon date.  Burgers & Fries at Paradise Bar & Grill!!  That morning Mj biked 40 miles and I went to the gym.  Then we did ice skating for two hours and I busted my butt.  We'd earned it!  The last time I indulged on a burger and fries was a year ago on our honeymoon so I was really looking forward to this part.  Their burgers did not disappoint.  They were jumbo sized and full of flavor.  As the evening went on my knee got stiffer and I found that other body parts were hurting as well.  My other knee, my hip and my elbow.  I limped home on a majorly swollen knee but it was still a fantastic date in my book.

Date Night Do Over

This was going to be an all day date.  I didn't know him that well so it could either go really good or really bad.  He did all the planning so I had no idea what we'd be doing.  He picked me up and we went out for pizza and go cart racing.  After that we went over to Walmart and bought kites before heading to the beach.  We flew kites in the park and then when it got really chilly we drove over by the water and talked in his car while we watched the sunset.  We never did make it to the movies that night.  That was three years ago but I'd say things went pretty well considering the guy that picked me up for what was to be our 2nd date is my now my husband.  I had so much fun that I wanted us to do it all over again.

Lunch time

Three years later it's June instead of March.  That's how long it took for us to work this special date into our Mj's travel schedule.  The first time Mj got a red light ticket on the way to lunch in what was to be our first official picture but this time after a quick stop at the car wash we got to Filippe's Pizza without incident.   The place has this mob type atmosphere about it and was totally unchanged from three years ago.  We even got seated at the same table where it took about 10 minutes for our eyes to adjust to the darkness in the windowless room.  Within 15 minutes we'd each ordered beers, small pizzas with our toppings of choice and some garlic bread.  We were both starving by the time our piping hot pizzas were brought out.  Forget about being lady like.  The pizza is so good that I didn't care if I looked like a pig last time and ate the whole thing by myself.  I planned on demolishing it again and almost made it but neither one of us could finish our last slice.  I can appreciate chivalry so I did not interfere with his desire to pay for everything before but this time I thought it might be a nice gesture to pay for lunch.

One for me, one for you.  Pizza & Beer.  Love it!!!

We went over to the Speedway next.  We were still in the system from three years ago (me with my maiden name) so we didn't have to fill out the release of liability forms.  We got into our race cars and waited for our signal to go.  Mj took off like a lightning bolt and had already turned three corners by the time I was just barely into my first.  As expected he lapped me.  The next time I saw him coming up behind me I sped up to try to keep him from passing me again.  I put up a good fight and held him off for a while but eventually he passed me up again.  He finished first and I was 6th.  Out of 6.  I get nervous going too fast around corners because it feels like I'm going to tip over.

Suiting up

Ready to Rumble

After that we went to to Walmart to get our kites.  As we walked in Mj said, "This was the very first place I ever held your hand."  I remembered and my little girly girl heart melted when he said that he remembered too.  After asking a couple employees where the kites were, two of which didn't even know what they were, we discovered that they had kite strings but no kites.  Huh?  So we got bubbles instead.  Don't all couples in love blow bubbles together?  It's June which means June gloom in So Cal.  So not only did the sun disappear as we got closer to the coast but after we got to Mission Beach I realized that the sun sets much, much later in June so even if it had come out we wouldn't have stuck around to watch it set.  We blew bubbles and cuddled on the blanket and enjoyed ourselves anyways.  When I got too cold for comfort we left.

Time for bubbles

Three years ago after leaving Mission Beach we drove by the mall with the idea of going to the movies and ended up chatting in his car with the engine running in the parking lot for about an hour instead.  We weren't sure what we wanted to see and were contemplating how crowded it would be.  I liked him but I didn't know if I LIKED him, liked him.  I had a good time and all but being out with him all day totally disrupted my normal exciting routine of staying in on weekends and I was ready to get home.  Not only do I like him now, I love him so I figured it would be OK to extend our date for another couple hours and this time we made it to the movies.  Bridesmaids was the perfect date night movie to cap off such a great date.  It had everything I love in a chick flick to keep me happy but was sprinkled with enough comedy and raunchy bits to keep him entertained.  I must say the date was even better this time.  We got to go home together at the end of the night and that level of comfort and love that I enjoy so much is already there. 

I hooked him on our 1st date at TGI Friday's.  We both ordered dinner salads and I think it was the 1st and last time I ever saw him do that.  He already liked me enough to plan on spending a whole day with me for our 2nd but it wasn't until our much simpler 3rd date at Souplantation that I fell in love.  I met him after work and watched him play a Basketball game then with him still in his gym clothes we sat there forever talking well after we finished eating.  There was nothing fancy about that date, but something about that night just did it for me.  Our 4th date was a gondola ride and the most romantic of them all but that 2nd date still stands out for me.  I thought it was so cute how he planned out all of those activities and at 7 hours it was the longest date I'd ever been on.  Maybe I hadn't quite made up my mind about him yet but it sure didn't take long.  The rest as they say is history.

Everything is Beautiful at the Ballet

Photo Source:  Joffrey Ballet

Mj's job has monthly drawings that they can put in to win.   This time he entered to win the ballet not because he has any desire whatsoever to see a ballet but because he knew that I would love it.  He didn't expect to win but lo and behold he did and off to the ballet we went.  I rushed home and changed after work Friday then we headed downtown because we wanted to get something to eat before the show.  Mj was also interested in drinking as much as he could to help him cope with a two hour ballet performance.  We found this cool place with awesome happy hour prices.  I was able to buy one single slider for $1!  Love it.  We split some really cheap appetizers.  I had a cosmo and Mj had tequila AND  10% alcohol beer.  Then, it was a 5 minute walk to the theater.  

Everyone is so casual here but I actually think that this is the one time I didn't see anyone wearing jeans.  The wide sweeping lobby with the rich carpeting.  The tuxedoed ticket takers and the plush red seating.  That's before you even get to the dancers who are perfection and beauty in motion.   There is something about those gorgeous pink toe shoes...it's just beautiful.  There were three pieces all performed by the Joffrey Ballet Company and two intermissions.  Mj kept asking if it was over yet but I was captivated by the music and the exquisite dancing.  They make it look so easy but having taken ballet myself I know how hard it is.  Every arm placement and every leg movement must be precise.  Those tiny little flutter like frappe's are quick and small but when done badly (like I did) they look awful!  It takes so much control and flexibility.  It was nothing like the Nutcracker. It was very lyrical and a whole lot less stiff and structured from the music to the costumes and backgrounds.  There were no tutus in sight and one entire piece was done without pointe shoes.  It was cool to see something different and I really enjoyed it even if Mj just tolerated it.  We've done baseball games and football games.  It's about time we gave some attention to the arts!  But at $75 per ticket even I wouldn't have wanted to pay that much so I'm glad it was comped.  It was a great date night and as far as I'm concerned everything really is beautiful at the ballet.