You Are Enough

I didn't realize how much it would mean or that I even needed to hear it at all until I did.  As I sat in my car outside work and finished listening these powerful words brought tears to my eyes and touched a place deep within my heart.
  
You are beautiful.  You are enough.  The world we live in is twisted and broken and for your entire life you will be subjected to all kinds of lies that tell you that you are not enough.  You are not thin enough.  You are not tan enough.  You are not smooth, soft, shiny, firm, tight, fit, silky, blonde, hairless enough.  Your teeth are not white enough.  Your legs are not long enough.  Your clothes are not stylish enough.  You are not educated enough.  You don’t have enough experience.  You are not creative enough.

There is a beauty industry, a fashion industry, a television industry, (and most unfortunately) a pornography industry: and all of these have unique ways of communicating to bright young women: you are not beautiful, sexy, smart or valuable enough.

You must have the clarity and common sense to know that none of that is true. None of it.

You were created for a purpose, exactly so.  You have innate value.  You are loved more than you could ever comprehend; it is mind-boggling how much you are adored.  There has never been, and there will never be another you.  Therefore, you have unique thoughts to offer the world.  They are only yours, and we all lose out if you are too fearful to share them.

You are beautiful.  You are valuable.  You are enough.

I'm smiling up at my husband

I know how it feels to be that girl who feels worthless and does not believe she is good enough.  I never believed in myself and felt I had nothing to offer.  I've come such a long way towards accepting and finding the good in myself after spending so many years tearing myself down.  I am not the same person I was in my teens and 20's and that's a good thing. Some measure of peace and acceptance has come with age, life experiences and a wonderful husband and for that I am grateful.  Had I heard these same words back then they would have made me cry but I probably wouldn't have believed them for even a second.  Today they not only made me cry but I actually believe them to be true.  I cried for the sad and depressed teenage girl I used to be but then I smiled at the more confident and happy woman I have become.

This is #10.  You can find the rest of Ten Things I Want to Tell Teenage Girls on Kate Connor's blog Lilly Pads.  Thank you Kate for writing this and thank you AJ of from Star 94.1 for seeing the value in this and sharing it on the radio.  I'm sure I'm not the only girl who needed to hear it.  I'm not a teenager anymore but I can still relate.  It applies to women of all ages.

Wine Tasting and a Picnic

Friday I had the day off.  I spent the morning running errands then my big sister and nephew came down and we met some friends for lunch.  We stayed up late watching a movie and had a great time.  I love spending time with her. 

It was so cool to wake up Saturday morning after having such a great day off Friday and still have my whole weekend to look forward to.  Aren't three day weekends the best?  We live just a little over an hour away from wine country but I've never ever been.  For Christmas my mom got Mj and I a Living Social Deal for Wine Tasting at Danza Del Sol Winery so we finally made it up there.  I was so worried about the weather spoiling our outing.  It has been a little chilly and rainy lately but this day could not have been more perfect.  It was a balmy 81 degrees.  The winery grounds were really green and beautiful.  We got a 20 minute tour, six tastings and a bottle of wine of our choice to take home.  They had some really tasty sweet wines.  We also used our 10% off for the day to buy an extra one.  It was fun.  I managed to get a little tipsy off of my tastings so Mj had to drive us to our next stop. 

Turns out that the winery didn't have a grassy area for a picnic so we went to a nearby park called Lake Skinner.  It was so pretty and peaceful out there.   It's been a while since we had a picnic.  We do it pretty simple.  Just wine, cheese, crackers, Olive Bruschetta, Naan Bread, lunch meat and grapes.  We ate and enjoyed the scenery and then fell asleep.  I love a good afternoon nap and one at the park is even better.  I drifted off to sleep with the feel the warm breeze on my face and the sounds of birds and people laughing in the distance.  It was so soothing and relaxing.  We spent three hours there on that blanket under a tree just chillin'.

What a great weekend it was.  Too bad it goes by so fast.  Monday morning will be a rude awakening.

Birthday Spoils

A night out downtown

Basil, Ricotta and Mozzarella Cheese Pizza.  Their Pizza is sooooo good.

Yes, I'm an April Fool's Day Baby.  My Birthday was on Sunday but I actually started celebrating last weekend.  It's a big one.  Why not?  Mj and I met up with a bunch of his friends downtown at a cool loft like urban bar called Basic that basically only serves Pizza and salad.  They provide paper plates to eat it on.  You know, Basic.  But their Pizza is anything but.  Who knew that Mashed Potato Pizza would actually taste good?   We ordered three different kinds and each one was just as tasty as the one before it.  Every time they brought a pie out it was literally gone in minutes because we snatched them up so fast.  Afterward we went dancing downtown where all the hoochie mama's in their tight short dresses made me feel ancient.  I swear, I was never THAT bad!  I personally am too old to freeze my ass off in my cute LBD that I bought a while ago and still haven't had a chance to wear so I stuck with my standard leggings and boots.  We stayed out later then we have in a long time.  We were party animals!  We didn't get home until about 1:30am.

Friday night I met up with a bunch of my girlfriends and one of our favorite happy hour spots.  It's cheap, low key and we all love to go there.  We've been going there for years.  Not much has changed and that's how I like it.   They have free cheese, tortilla chips, veggies, ranch and salsa out back.  What more could I ever want?  I don't even order food when I go there.  I can get a glass of wine for $3.00 and then after that I can get it for $5.00.  It makes for a fun cheap night out.

I got a free ice cream scoop

Saturday afternoon I met up with my mom at a little mall at the half way point between where we live for some mother daughter bonding time.  She took me shopping!  I found two really cute tops and then we stopped for coffee before heading over to Spa Gregorie's.  This place is so nice.  I normally just get my pedicures at the strip mall nail shop down the street.  Those places are mills.  There is no ambiance and they massage your feet for about 2 minutes if you are lucky.  Well, when you go to a spa it's totally different.  My pedicure took one full hour which included a full on foot massage and relaxing music.  It was heaven.  They definitely charge more but like everything else you usually get what you pay for.  Mj (the sweetheart that he is) bought us both Spa Gregorie's Groupon's so we'll definitely be going back.  After that we walked over to a really nice restaurant in that same mall and had a nice dinner at Paradise Grill.  I'm in their Club so I got a free entree coupon for by Birthday.  It was such a nice day out with mom.  Oh my goodness did I ever feel spoiled; and there was more of it to come the next day.

My big sis and her husband

I love their Lasagna!! I've heard it's frozen but I don't care.

My new fav wine

I asked my family to come to us so I wouldn't have to travel anywhere for the day.  I woke up pretty early and did an exercise video.  Then I took a shower and put my robe on and watched some TV.  I got sleepy so then I took a  nap and woke up just in time to get dressed and ready.  It was a perfect relaxing start to my Birthday and then before too long it was time to chow down because I wanted us to do an early dinner.  I haven't been to Olive Garden in forever so that's the spot I chose for my Birthday dinner.  Oh Lasagna Classico how I adore you... it was just as good as I remembered.  I found my new favorite wine too.  It's called Roscato and it's basically the perfect wine for me.  It's sweet, fruity and I had my fill of it because we got a bottle for the table.  We came back to my house and lounged around a bit and then it was time for Cake.  Or should I say Cupcakes.

My nephew couldn't wait to get his hands on 'em

Mom, Dad and Nephew

Mj surprised me by making four different kinds of cupcakes from scratch three of which had Peanut Butter Frosting which he knows is my favorite.  The funny thing is that I didn't even notice that he made them.  He made Cinnamon Pound cake, Peanut Butter & Jelly, Chocolate Reese's Peanut Butter Cup and Strawberry Jelly cup cakes.  I ate the Peanut Butter Cup and it was so delicious.  We each brought some to work but still I'll be eating cupcakes for days!!  Then, it was time for presents.  My little sis sent me a pretty necklace with a little wishbone on it.  My older sis got me a Pink water bottle and Pink ear buds for the gym.  Mj got me the perfect pink and black work out bag. It's so cute and stylish.  He knew I didn't want a boxy old gym bag and picked out the perfect one with plenty of extra pockets.  He also got me Under Armour work out gear and pink work out socks.  I go to the gym enough now that people actually by me work out related gifts...and I actually want them!  I was tired as heck after work but actually excited about going so I could show off use my new stuff.

Can you guess what my favorite color is? Right down to the toe nails.

I'm normally not into making much to do about by Birthday.  Half the time I beg Mj not to buy me anything and I'll often look for the cheapest place for dinner so no one has to spend too much money on my account but I must say it was nice to feel totally spoiled.  Overall I'd have to say that the agony of turning 35 was well worth it. 

Now We Need Bar Stools

We got our kitchen counter tops re done and raised our bar area so now we need bar height bar stools.  I love it that Mj cares about the home decor in our house.  The only problem is that he can be really, really picky.  This often makes picking out anything from throw pillows to shelves quite a frustrating experience.  There are times when he will tell me he doesn't like something without explanation.  No he doesn't know why...he just can't put his finger on it.  What am I supposed to do with that?  Especially if it's something I really like and he can't even tell me why he doesn't.  I'll show him item after item and he'll veto every single one.  So imagine my excitement when he tells me that I get to pick out the bar stools all on my own. His only rule is that they not be cheap.  El cheapo used to be my middle name so I know why he felt the need to emphasize this.  I don't want to bring anything home that he hates so as I'm searching I do run stuff across him.  True to his word he is mostly non committal unless he really hates it...which is fine because I don't want him to hate anything in his house.

I get to pick out whatever I want.  This is great.  The only thing is that I have no idea which ones to get!  I started out wanting something bright and modern.  Funky even.  Just because it's a chance to introduce something new into our decor.  Then, I changed my mind and thought that the more traditional chair might work better with what we already have.  Now, I just have no clue.  Red, Brown, wooden, adjustable height?   I read reviews, I browse countless websites and I compare prices.  I stare at our counter and try to envision them there.  I just end up more confused and undecided.  I cannot ask Mj to help me figure it out.  I'm determined to find the perfect ones on my own.

I've got links to ones I like bookmarked all over the place.  Here are a some that I'm considering.  Any input would be greatly appreciated.

Photo Source:  West Elm $338 for 2 (I'd get the Brown)

Photo Source:  Overstock.com  $186.29 set of 2

Photo Source:  morebarstools.com $104.78 each

I'm hoping that I'll have time on Saturday to go to a store that carries nothing but bar stools and that I can make a decision soon.  I'm pretty sure that I'm obsessing way too much over this but it's what I do.  I can't help it.